#I hate it when a hyperfixation gets this deep
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rosesocietyy · 8 months ago
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I'm still watching that wretched trailer over and over again it's been hours like it's getting serious now I really need to stop
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savage-rhi · 4 months ago
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Fuschia/Magenta?
#*deep breath kicks down uni door*#VERN!!! VERNIFRED!!! I GOT A HUGE BONE TO PICK WITH YOU!!!!! YES YOU!!!!#“we're only gonna read 1 chap of Don Quixote because it's too much to dive into.”#THIS COMING FROM THE MAN WHO MADE US READ THE ENTIRETY OF DANTES INFERNO#WHO MADE US WRITE 20 PAGE ESSAYS ON THE ODYSSEY#WHO MADE US FOLLOW HIS CANTERBURY TALES HYPERFIXATION FOR NOT 1 BUT 2 SEMESTERS#DISSECTING EVERY. FUCKING. CHARACTER. ACTION.#MAKING ME RESENT CHAUCER TO WHERE I COULDN'T WATCH A KNIGHTS TALE FOR 3 YEARS STRAIGHT#one of my all time favorite movies btw YOU MADE ME HATE THE THING I LOVED VERNIFRED#and you had the GALL to say the class only had 1 chap to dedicate to Don Quixote?#YOU MY FRIEND JUST DIDN'T WANT THE CLASS TO LOSE THEIR SHIT LAUGHING EVERY OTHER CHAPTER#IF YOU'RE AROUND HUMAN HAPPINESS YOU'RE LIKE A WORM DISCOVERING THE BAIT SECTION AT WALMART#ITS EASY TO READ FOR A CLASSIC HAS WIT IS BITTER SWEET AF IS TRAGIC IS FUN AND MAKES YOU WANT TO HAVE CRAZY MAN BIG DICK ENERGY#WHEN YOU HAVE A FOOT IN THE GRAVE#and the banter...THAT SHIT ROCKS#AND IM NOT JUST SAYING THIS CAUSE OF MY OWN HYPERFIX WITH LUIS AND I'M READING FOR RESEARCH#these stories FUCK#I AM SO MAD#SO SO MAD MY PEERS AND I GOT A TASTE OF SOMETHING THAT WOULD'VE KEPT US ENGAGED#AND I AM MAD THAT I RESENTED THAT CLASS SO MUCH THAT I DIDN'T WANT TO TOUCH THE CLASSICS FOR A WHILE#and that it took me until I'm 31 WRITING A DAMN FANFIC IN MY SPARE TIME TO READ THE ENTIRETY OF WHAT I FUCKING MISSED OUT ON#astarion voice: IT WAS RIGHT THERE!!!!!#vernifred...can i can i call you vern?#look...i love you. you were one of the most humble profs i had i looked forward to going to class every mon and tues for lecture and reading#i get the hyperfixations my guy i really and truly do#BUT I STILL RESENT THE SHIT OUT OF YOU FOR THIS ONE#i finally get why luis loved this shit so much too and im seeing more connections with re4 now and it feels like the cherry on top of it all#vern....just....SIGH....GIVE THE DON A CHANCE MAN#FOR THE SAKE OF THE CHILDREN WHO WILL BE IN YOUR CARE#YOU KNOW...YOU JUST...MAKE ME...GRRRHFHFHHDJDJ!!! 🖕🏼🖕🏼🖕🏼
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nitrokiraru · 10 months ago
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small vent post sowwy
a big hyperfixation i have is basically crumbling before my eyes, and i keep seeing constant hate posts abt it n if you know how hyperfixations can get this is affecting me A Lot 💔 i’ve been rly anxious all day T_T i might become more active on tumblr to cope honestly at least n+c’s fandom is small enough to where big drama doesn’t rly happen anymore
i hate my doomscrolling habit!!! i hate anxiety!!!! that tis all
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the-gayest-show · 8 hours ago
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RRAAAAAAAA
researching north korean censorship is so FUNNNN WHY OH WHYYYY DID I CHOOSE THIS FOR AN ASSIGNMENT WHERE IM FORCED TO BOIL IT DOWNNNNNN
THERES ONE BILLION TONNES OF INFO MY BRAIN IS EATING UP LIKE A MOTHERFUCKER AND YALL WONT BELIEVE IT
SO MUCH INFO OUT THERE LIKE HOLY SHIT. CAN YALL BELIEVE THAT NORTH KOREA STILL THINKS IT'S DEAD POLITICIANS ARE "ETERNAL PRESIDENT" OR SOMETHING??? THERE'S A WHOLE YT CHANNEL THAT JUST HAS ARCHIVES OF DAILY NEWSCASTS. AND ENGLISH SUBTITLED. AND I LEARNED ABOUT THE INTRANET (not to be confused with internet) IUFSFHIERUHGFSYFYGR AND THEN THERE'S THE PHONES AND TABLETS WITH SPECIAL SOFTWARES THE GOVERNMENT USES TO SPY ON PEOPLE AND HAVE THEM INSTAL PREAPPROVED APPS AND THEN THERE'S THE WHOLE DEAL WITH THE IDOLAZATION OF THE KIM FAMILY AND KIM JONG UN AND NRGIRDIGSHBFR
saw a documentary that's literally only praising bro. like nothing negative god forbid, but they do shit talk america and shit.
RAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA IM BLESSED WITH THE RESEARCH AND MEDIA SPECIAL INTEREST AUTISM BUT I CAN'T STOP RESEARCHINGGGGGG
been watching yt vids all the time and doing deep dives and i found an article going in depth about ullim which is a stupid device that acts mostly like north korean phones in how they take pictures of every app you open and only let you have preapproved apps and only lets you open files from either your devie and the government and no one else
depicted below is my mind coping with how i cant yap about only one section of the presentation in length
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etherealspacejelly · 1 year ago
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sometimes you just have to let yourself be a bit neurodivergent.
i hate going out, it gives me a lot of anxiety and sensory input that i dont like, and i am often forced to talk to people.
so i do this thing on more difficult days, or sometimes just for fun, where i "bring a fictional character with me". i walk and imagine Fictional Character walking next to me. they talk to me, reassure me, hype me up, whatever i need them to do.
today dean winchester came christmas shopping with me. he went over the list with me of stuff i needed to get, told me i was doing a good job every time i finished in a certain shop, reminded me to take a deep breath when i got a little overwhelmed.
and yea. its kinda silly. and i know its just me talking to myself in a different voice, but it Works! especially since all of my special interests/hyperfixations tend to be tv/movie related.
so do what you gotta do to Get Shit Done. stop holding yourself to neurotypical standards. if you need Fictional Character to tell you you're doing a good job, do it! if you need Favourite Singer to walk you to school, do it! yea it might feel silly but you're literally fighting against your own brain to get stuff done every single day. you can have a little self indulgent daydream, as a treat.
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rubysparx · 1 year ago
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Listen I KNOW dungeon meshi ended. I’m scared ok I don’t wanna finish it just. Gimme a sec
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slut4thebroken · 6 months ago
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Teacher’s Pet
── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ──
Pairing | Jonathan Crane x reader
Summary | After months of trying to earn your professor’s praise, he finally gives you an opportunity to prove you deserve it.
Warnings | Smut, dub con, blackmail, coercion, humiliation, anal, bondage, praise, creampie, degradation, inappropriate use of fear toxin.
Words | 6.2 k
Notes | Started this a million years ago. Finally got the motivation to finish it cause of @hllywdwhre ‘s fic that I proofread lol. Also ty to the post that gave me the fear toxin idea 🙏🏻
Ao3 link | <3
Masterlist
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In honor of the one year anniversary since the start of my Cillian hyperfixation <3
Dr. Crane was one of the most strict and unforgiving professors at Gotham University. He graded harshly, didn’t tolerate late or incomplete work, and no one would ever dare be late— if they were, they just wouldn’t show up because an absence was better than his response to tardiness. He didn’t have any favorite students, just some that he tolerated slightly more than the rest. That was what you hated the most. 
You’ve always been the favorite student for every single teacher you’ve had, whether they said it out loud or not. After the first couple of weeks, you figured he’d just be harder to crack than the rest. But after almost two months, you were starting to get frustrated. Nothing you did ever earned you any sort of praise. You were always early, always the first to turn in assignments, participated in class, paid attention— you were the perfect student. But he never seemed to recognize that. What made you snap was when he gave you a B on your latest essay. 
Lightly knocking on his office door, you tried to control your nerves and push down the nausea— You’ve never had to talk with a teacher about a grade before…
“Come in.” He called out. So you opened the door and hesitantly stepped inside. He glanced at you quickly, then did a double take once he realized it was you. “Close the door.” He said, resuming what he was doing. You took in a quiet, deep breath and closed the door before walking over and sitting on the chair across from his desk. 
“I’m assuming this is about your essay?” He asked, not even looking up from his work. 
“Yes.. You gave me a B, I was hoping to understand why.” You said tentatively. 
“Did you not read my notes?” Of course you did. But it still didn’t make any sense. 
“No, I did, but-” He finally looked up at you with a sigh. 
“Then you should understand why I gave you that grade.”
“This essay was practically perfect.” You argued, holding up the stapled together pieces of paper, marked up with red ink. 
“Clearly not if you got a B.” He raised his brows and you clenched your jaw, trying not to get too upset or emotional.
“Dr. Crane, I’ve aced every single test and assignment, I’d hardly say this is a fair grade.” You frowned. 
“Your argument was weak and biased.” Your lips parted in shock at the bluntness of his criticism. “And your previous assignments have no impact on my grading. If you’d like them to though, I’d be more than willing to grade them again to see if I missed anything.” 
“It- it wasn’t… I spent weeks on this.” 
“And yet… You still weren’t good enough for an A.” He said, making your stomach churn. Especially because he didn’t even say ‘your essay’ he just said ‘you.’ Looking down at the papers in your hands, you scanned them quickly as if it would magically give you the answer. “Review my notes for the next essay. Maybe you’ll do better.” 
“What is your problem with me?” You snapped, looking up at him again, watching his brows raise slightly. “Have I done something to offend you?” 
“I don’t tolerate entitled students who are used to being the teacher's pet. Whatever previous, unearned success and praise you're used to receiving is of no concern to me. It is not my fault if you came into this class expecting to be treated differently for doing the same thing as every other student.” 
“I- I’m not.. entitled. I just like my work and effort to be appreciated and not.. given a B.” 
“You want me to tell you that you’re such a good girl, turning in everything on time— as expected— and doing well on your assignments— as expected.” The faux praise, as well as the condescension that laced his voice, made your cheeks heat up instantly. 
“No, but,” 
“Then I think we’re done here.” 
The next day, you almost considered not going to class, but you’ve never had an absence on your record and you’re not about to start now. 
“We’re going to deviate from the lesson plan a little and talk about something else today; fear. Specifically, fear of rejection.” Your mouth dropped open at his words and if you had any doubts that this was because of your previous conversation, they quickly disappeared when he made eye contact with you.  
“There are a few different causes, can anyone give me an example?” This would’ve been the time where you raised your hand. But that apparently wasn’t necessary because he called on you anyway, making you freeze. 
“Um, I— I’m not sure.” You said nervously, sinking back into your chair a little. 
“There’s a perfect example right there; anxiety and social comparison. Too anxious and insecure to answer a simple question. Who else can give an example?” You stared at him with wide eyes that quickly started burning with tears. Now you felt even more stupid than you would’ve, had you just answered him and potentially gotten it wrong.
Class dragged on slowly. He talked more about causes, what it looks like, how it affects performance— especially in school— and various treatments. 
You couldn’t have been more relieved when he finally dismissed the class. You rushed to pack your things and stood up, quickly making your way to the exit. 
When he called your name though, you froze, praying you heard him wrong. “Stay back for a moment.” Your peers gave you sympathetic looks as you turned around and slowly made your way back over to his desk. 
“Yes, professor?” You asked, voice strained. 
“I hope you found today's lesson helpful.” You gritted your teeth and gave him a dry smile. 
“It was… inspiring, Dr. Crane.” You said plainly, trying to control your tone. His expression was only becoming more and more amused. 
“I’m glad. Though I didn’t see you taking notes.” That made you falter. 
“I- I was,”
“Great. Let me see them.” You looked away from him and shifted your weight awkwardly. 
“See them?” 
“Did you not understand?” Your face flushed with anger and embarrassment at his patronizing tone. 
“I did. I just wasn’t aware that notes were something you needed to see.” 
“If a student isn’t paying attention for the entirety of my class then, yes, notes are something I need to see.” You swallowed thickly, trying to come up with a response, and he watched you intently as he waited.  
“Look, professor, you’ve made your point, okay? I don’t think you need to continue humiliating me.” You said quietly, not looking at him. He let out a heavy breath through his nose and you watched in your peripheral vision as he took off his glasses, setting them down. He slowly rounded the desk and you couldn’t help it when you instinctively took a step back. 
“That’s a shame. I had hoped this lecture would’ve been helpful, but since you clearly weren’t paying attention, maybe I need to try another method.” 
“I- I was paying attention…” You muttered, keeping your head down. 
“Really? Then why don’t you tell me some of the ways one can overcome a fear of rejection.” He leaned back on his desk and crossed his arms over his chest. The feeling of his eyes on you almost made you shiver and you took a quiet, deep breath before lifting your head to look at him again. 
This is an easy enough question. You can probably figure out the answer if you just use critical thinking since he was correct about you not paying attention. 
“Um… cognitive behavioral therapy?” You waited and when he didn’t out right humiliate you, you assumed that was a right answer and continued. “Exposure therapy. Self esteem enhancement… Emotion regulation?” 
“Anything else?” 
“…You said “some.’” You muttered, briefly looking away from him again. 
“I did, didn’t I?” His tone made it clear that he didn’t care about what he previously said. 
“Um, I- I’m not sure…” 
“Feel free to use your notes.” 
Fuck. 
When you looked up and saw the almost smug expression on his face, you finally snapped. “I’m sorry, okay? I’m sorry that for one day, I couldn’t pay attention after you humiliated me in front of the entire class.” You spat, clenching your jaw as soon as you finished speaking. The longer he stayed silent, the more uncomfortable you became under his gaze, making you look away from him awkwardly. 
“Tell me why this shouldn’t affect your grade.” You knew his question was rhetorical, but you still tried to defend yourself. 
“Dr. Crane,” You started, but he raised his brows, silently warning you to not talk back. 
“I’ll see you later today during my office hours.” He said as he packed up his belongings. 
“But,” 
“Five pm.” He didn’t let you continue as he walked toward the door. All you could do was stand there and watch him leave. 
At 4:30 you paced around your dorm, debating what to do. At 4:35 you decided not to go. At 4:40 you changed your mind. At 4:50 you were pacing outside his office. At 4:55 you finally knocked, feeling like you could throw up at any second. He called out for you to enter, so you hesitantly opened the door and stepped inside. 
“Close the door and sit down.” He didn’t even look up from what he was working on. You closed the door quietly, then made your way over to the chair in front of his desk. You tried to sit there patiently, but he wasn’t saying anything. Your leg bounced incessantly as you picked at your cuticles, over thinking more and more with each tortuous second that dragged on. 
“Professor?” You finally asked. 
“You’re early. I told you to come at five and I need to finish this.” He still didn’t look up from whatever “this” was and you were quickly growing angrier. 
Was this some kind of mind fuck? Making you sit here, stewing in nerves that were only getting worse? You weren’t sure how much time had passed because you didn’t want to check your phone and give him another opportunity to chastise you. But after a while, he finally sighed and gathered the papers, setting them in a pile on the side of his desk. 
You forced yourself to stop bouncing your leg and place your palms flat on your thighs to keep from fidgeting, trying to exude confidence you were severely lacking. 
“I’ll admit, I’ve been struggling to decide what I should do with you.” Immediately your stomach churned, getting even more anxious. “I could have you removed from my class, but that would be a lot of paperwork.”
“Professor,” 
“I’m speaking.” He said harshly, making your mouth immediately close. “However, that does mean I’ll have to put up with this for another few months… So the paperwork might be worth the hassle.” You tried not to cry at the thought. You need this class to graduate— getting dropped from it will set you back a semester unless you add another course to your already heavy schedule for next semester. You waited, not sure if he was done talking or not. After another few seconds you decided to try again. 
“Please…” You said hesitantly, waiting for him to snap at you again. When he didn’t, you continued. “Please don’t drop me, professor. I need this class to graduate.” He stayed silent, eyes dragging over your body as you did your best not to squirm. He still hasn’t said anything… Is he going to drop you anyway? With tears in your eyes, you tried again, “Please… Please I- I’ll leave you alone— I won’t bother you about grades anymore, I swear, just please don’t drop me.” You all but whimpered, feeling even more pathetic now. 
He sighed and took off his glasses, then set them on his desk before leaning back in his chair a little, still studying you. 
“I’d still have to put up with you in class as well though.” 
“Please! I’ll sit in the back and not talk— I’ll do anything, just please don’t drop me.” You cried.
“Anything?” You stiffened a little at the dark expression that suddenly took over his face. Would you really do anything? You wouldn’t mind fucking him if that’s what he’s implying— despite his off putting personality, you’ve always been attracted to him.  
“Y-yes?” You said, unsure.  
“That didn’t sound very convincing and I’m not going to force you so I’ll just go through with the drop request,”
“No! I will— I’ll do anything… Please.” He continued studying you, probably trying to gauge if you were telling the truth or not. 
“Fine. We’ll call it an internship of sorts. You’ll come with me to Arkham Asylum every Friday and help me in whatever way I may need— no questions asked.” 
“I- I don’t know if I’m qualified for that.” 
“Good thing it’s not an actual internship then.” He sneered, the patronizing tone making you blush. 
“What will you have me do?” You asked quietly. 
“It’ll be easier to just show you instead. Give me your essay and after Friday if I’m satisfied with your performance, I’ll change the grade.” Your heart practically skipped a beat— all you have to do is go to Arkham with him for a day and you’ll get an A? You’d be stupid to say no. So you retrieved your essay from your bag and handed it to him. “Good. Six pm, do not be late. I’ll meet you in the main lobby to take you to my office.” He said sternly. 
Since you left his office, your heart has been pounding. You weren’t sure what to wear so you just decided on a skirt and blouse that were professional, but still mostly casual. After that, there wasn’t much else you could do. You were too anxious to focus on literally anything so you just sat at home, overthinking. Friday rolled around and you left at five, just in case anything happened, and arrived at 5:25. So you sat in your car, waiting anxiously and watching the clock on the dashboard. You were too scared to even listen to music. At 5:55 you decided to go in, worst case you’d just have to wait five minutes for him, but you figured it’d be better to be early— even after what happened during his office hours. 
It was only a minute before six when he showed up. The second he saw you, he gestured for you to follow, so you trailed after him on wobbly legs. When you arrived in his office, he closed the door and told you to sit in the chair across from him as he sat behind the desk. 
“I want to make sure that we’re on the same page and I have your consent for anything that happens here.” The way he worded that made you nervous, but you chalked it up to the fact that you were already overcome with anxiety.
“Yes.” You tried to sound sure of yourself, but you were having doubts. What would he make you do? Would it really be worth a better grade?
“Good. Take this.” He picked up a small paper cup from his desk with one pill inside and handed it to you. 
“…Why?”
“There are certain aerosol drugs that are administered to patients sometimes. That will keep them from affecting you.” He explained calmly, easing your nerves a bit. So you took it from him and swallowed it, waiting for what was next. “Follow me.” He stood up again, this time holding a briefcase, and you followed him out of his office. He led you down some hallways before stopping outside of a door and unlocking it, gesturing for you to walk in. 
There was a small table in the corner and two exam chairs with restraints on them, one of which had stirrups. Other than that the room was bare. The door closed loudly, making you jump and turn around. 
“Sit.” He ordered, walking over to the table and setting the briefcase down before walking toward you. 
“Why?” You asked skeptically. He just stood patiently and watched you. You suddenly got hit with a wave of dizziness and stumbled to the chair to sit down. The dizziness quickly turned into exhaustion and you could barely keep your eyes open. When you started falling forward, he quickly moved closer to catch you, then leaned you back against the chair. 
Your head hurt like hell and you forced your eyes open to find that you were now laying on the other exam chair, thankfully not with your legs in the stirrups, but with the restraints on your wrists. You don’t even remember falling asleep. 
“The effects should wear off soon. I apologize for using that, but I figured you wouldn’t willingly let me restrain you and I didn’t feel like fighting you.” 
“What… what was that?” You asked through a breath. You could slowly feel yourself getting less and less foggy. 
“A drug.” He said, in the most annoyed and patronizing tone you’ve heard from him so far. 
“Why?” You whimpered, closing your eyes again because they still felt so heavy. 
“If you’re going to ask stupid questions then I’m just going to gag you. I already answered that.” You heard some rustling noises and his footsteps, then a hand was running along your cheek, startling you and making you open your eyes. “You remember our agreement?” You nodded hesitantly. It felt like your heart was about to beat out of your chest with how hard and fast it was pounding. “Be a good little girl and if I’m satisfied, I won’t drop you. I might even change the grade of your essay.” You didn’t need the reminder, but the way he said the first part was making your stomach flutter. 
“I have to say,” he removed his hand from your cheek and moved down to place it on your leg, just above your knee, “I prefer the sluttier skirts you wear to class than this.” He teased the hem of your skirt with his fingers, making you tremble. “Next week wear something shorter. And a more flattering top.” You figured by ‘more flattering’ what he really meant was more revealing. All you could do to respond was nod. 
“Good. Let’s begin.” 
He reached for the zipper of your skirt on your hip, making you stiffen. 
“What the hell are you doing?” You asked, beginning to panic again, and he paused with a sigh. 
“If you don’t consent, that’s fine… There is still the matter of your seat in my class.” He said coyly. “If you want me to let you go, just say that. I’ll fill out the paperwork first thing Monday morning.” 
“No,” You choked out. “No.. please.” You felt like you were on the verge of a panic attack. He shushed you softly, staring at you with a teasing glint in his eyes. 
“Relax. If you consent to this, you’ll keep your seat in my class. That’s what you want, isn’t it?” You nodded, looking up at him with teary eyes. “Good girl… Now be quiet and let me do this.” His tone was significantly darker and all you could do was tremble as he unzipped your skirt, then pulled it down your body before discarding it on the floor. 
“I’ve been working on a new form of a drug.” You squeezed your eyes shut and let out a strangled whimper when he grabbed your leg and placed it in the stirrup, then used the restraints to keep it in place. “We’re going to try it together.” He grinned wolfishly and did the same to your other leg. 
You heard his footsteps as he walked across the room for something, then back over to you, now wearing a latex glove on his right hand, holding a small bottle in the other. 
“Remember, you can withdraw consent at any time…” You couldn’t though. Because you would be dropped from his class and set back months. 
His hand landed on your thigh, making you jump a little, and he started slowly dragging it up. Once he was close enough, he brushed his thumb over your clothed mound, forcing a quiet sob from you.  
“You probably thought this was going to go in a very different direction, didn’t you?” He asked teasingly, making you blush. Truthfully, you didn’t put much thought into your undergarments because you were too busy worrying about your actual clothes and what he was going to make you do. You cried out when he suddenly ripped the lace off your body, feeling the burn of the fabric pulling too hard against your skin. “Ready?” He asked, almost eagerly. 
You saw now that the bottle was a clear liquid and when he squirted it onto his fingers, you assumed it was lube. As soon as his finger brushed your asshole, you stiffened. 
“Wait!” You rushed out, chest heaving as your heart pounded in your chest. “I- I’ve never…” 
“You’ve never done anal?” You almost thought he was going to give you sympathy. “Good.” You couldn’t even get another word out before he was pushing a finger in, making you tense up as you whimpered in discomfort. “Tell me when you start to feel it.” 
“Feel what?” You said through a breath, trying to relax around the intrusion. Even though it wasn’t as bad as you were expecting, your heart was pounding even harder and faster in your chest, and your breathing grew ragged. “Dr. Crane,” You whimpered, suddenly a million times more anxious than only a moment ago. 
“Already?” He checked his watch, “That was fast. Tell me what you’re feeling.”
“Anxious.” You said quickly, letting out a strangled whimper when he forced another finger inside. “M-my heart is pounding and it feels hard to breathe.” 
“That’s good… Anything else?” 
“My hands are clammy… and it feels like I'm sweating a little.” 
“No visual or auditory hallucinations?” 
“What?” You choked out, eyes widening. “W-why would I have that??”
“The drug we’re testing is my fear toxin. It’s a hallucinogenic that targets the amygdala and releases stress hormones, causing a fear response in the brain.” He explained, only making you feel worse. “So far I’ve tested it two ways; administered intravenously and in aerosol form.” 
“I don’t understand..” You said quietly, trying to calm your breathing a little. He let out an exaggerated sigh and forced a third finger inside you. 
“I guess I should really expect you to.” He almost sounded.. disappointed. The realization made the twist in your stomach even worse. “Let me dumb it down for you. In its most potent form, it causes visual and auditory hallucinations of the subject’s worst fear.” If you weren’t currently on the verge of a panic attack with three fingers in your ass, you probably would’ve rolled your eyes at his tone. 
“Now I’m testing it via rectal administration. The concentration is about the same, but the effects shouldn’t be as strong. At least, that’s my theory.” His fingers continued fucking you slowly, occassionally spreading apart to open you up more. Despite the amount of anxiety you were currently feeling, you could just barely feel your growing arousal.  
“W-why would you want the drug in this form?” You asked, gasping for air between words. 
“I’m a doctor. Why wouldn’t I experiment?” He asked rhetorically. You bit your lip and squeezed your eyes shut, trying to focus on the anxiety rather than the arousal, but it was only becoming more difficult. A choked moan escaped you when he suddenly dragged a bare finger through your folds, spreading the evidence of your arousal. “Are you enjoying this?” His voice sounded unnervingly clinical. 
In response, you bit down harder on your lip and shook your head, denying it. You could practically feel his eyes on you, studying you closely. 
“I knew you’d be perfect for this.” He suddenly said, and you bit back a moan because he almost sounded proud. “You’re just pathetic enough and desperate for my approval to willingly become my little lab rat, and now look at you… Leaking onto my hand as I finger your ass.” He chuckled wryly. A dark blush took over your face and you whined quietly, but the flutter in your stomach was unmistakable. “I bet you want my cock also… Don’t you?” 
You let out a choked sob and turned your head, trying uselessly to hide yourself. When he suddenly pulled his fingers out, you whimpered quietly at the sudden loss. 
“Look at me.” He demanded, in a tone that left no room for argument. As if you were in a trance, you turned to face him and opened your eyes. “You want to keep your seat in my class?” He removed the glove and tossed it aside, then worked on unbuckling his belt and opening his pants. 
“Yes.” You whispered shakily. 
“And you’re willing to let me fuck your ass to ensure that happens?” He pulled his already half hard cock out and started stroking slowly as you gaped at it. How was that supposed to fit inside you?
“I- I’ve never..”
“It’s a yes or no question.” He sighed impatiently. “I fuck your ass or you leave and I fill out the form Monday morning.” 
“I… I’m scared.” You whimpered, looking nervously between his face and his cock. 
“That’s the whole point, darling.” Right. Because he was testing his fear toxin. You blushed furiously at the new pet name. “You have three seconds before I fuck you, then fill out the form anyway.” 
Your stomach dropped at the threat and when he raised his brows, you blurted out, “Yes.” Tears were brimming in your eyes and he stepped closer, but didn’t line up yet. He just used his free hand to gently rub your thigh. 
“Yes, what?” Your bottom lip began trembling when you realized what he wanted from you. “Say it. Beg your professor for it.”
“I- I want…” You let out a strangled sob and squeezed your eyes shut again, making his hand stop moving on your thigh to grip tightly in a silent warning. “I want you to fuck my ass… Please, Dr. Crane.” You whimpered. You’ve never felt more humiliated, but at the same time… you were only becoming more aroused. Your cunt ached to be filled, and your clit was practically throbbing.
“Good girl.” When you let out a choked moan at the sudden praise, he chuckled quietly. “Open your eyes. I want you to watch.” He demanded, lining up. Only after your eyes fluttered open, did he finally apply some pressure, entering you with little difficulty. 
“Fuck- You’re so tight.” He hissed, moving his hand to your other thigh and squeezing almost painfully. Your breath and all of your sounds were caught in your throat as he pushed in deeper, not stopping until his hips were flush with your ass. “Tell me how it feels.” He said breathily, not moving yet. 
“Big.” You whimpered, barely able to get the word out. 
“Does it hurt?” You shook your head, trying to steady your breathing, but the overwhelming feeling of being stretched as well as the anxiety still weighing heavy on your chest made it feel almost impossible. “You look like you’re on the verge of a panic attack.” He sounded uncharacteristically dulcet.
When he reached for your shirt and unbuttoned it to expose your bra, your breathing picked up even more as your heart started pounding even harder in your chest. He pulled your bra down below your breasts and groped you eagerly, showing little regard for your pleasure with his rough, almost painful touch. 
“Your heart’s beating so fast. Is my little lab rat still scared?” He cooed, very obviously mocking you. 
“Professor..” You whimpered, staring up at him with glossy eyes as you struggled to cope with all of the overwhelming feelings, both physically and emotionally. He shushed you softly and brought his hands back down to rub your thighs, trying to soothe you. 
“I’m going to fuck you, and you’re going to take it.” He said plainly. “You try to resist at all and I’ll keep fucking you until I finish, then you won’t have to bother showing up to class on Monday. Do you understand?” 
You nodded reluctantly and he moved his hands to grip the tops of your thighs. He slowly dragged his hips back, then forward again, forcing you to feel every inch of his cock stretching you open. It didn’t… hurt. But it definitely wasn’t the most pleasurable thing you’ve ever experienced. 
When he suddenly sped up, you cried out and squeezed your eyes shut, trying to focus on taking deep breaths. He was grunting and moaning quietly with each thrust, clearly enjoying this far more than you, and you couldn’t help but open your eyes again to watch him. His grip tightened on your thighs, making you whimper, and you watched his mouth fall open in a silent moan as he closed his eyes. 
“Fuck…” He said breathily, letting out a low groan before opening his eyes again. “I didn’t account for transdermal administration” He almost sounded amused again, but you could barely focus on his words. “The effects are far less than what you’re feeling, I’d assume. It almost feels like adrenaline, rather than fear. Next time we’ll try it intravaginally to see if your reaction is the same or more like mine.” 
You almost forgot that this wasn’t a one and done. You have to let your professor do what he wants with you every week for the rest of the semester…
“And I think I’ll try the other forms of delivery on you as well. Not so much for an experiment… I just want to fuck you while you’re hallucinating your greatest fears.” His lips curled up into a small smirk at the thought of that. “I can’t wait to hear you scream and cry for me.” He cooed, but his tone was far from comforting and your anxiety was only getting worse as he continued sharing his future plans for you. 
He started bucking into you rapidly and his sounds got louder, clearly getting closer to his release. You could even feel yourself just barely starting to inch toward the edge. Your moans caught his attention and a pleased look took over his face. 
“You like this, don’t you?” You let out a choked moan and bit your lip, trying to quiet your sounds. “It’s either that or misattribution of arousal... but that seems less likely.” Even though you knew his guess was correct, you were still going to convince yourself that it was misattribution of arousal instead because that was far less humiliating. When he started rubbing your clit, any chance you had of keeping quiet was gone instantly. His moans got louder too when your body tensed up, tightening around his cock. 
“Oh god— Dr. Crane, please.” You sobbed, feeling the arousal steadily taking over the anxiety that had settled in your stomach. 
“What do you want?” Now that he asked, you realized that you don’t even know what you want. You wanted the overwhelming anxiety and stretch to stop… but the thought of him pulling out and ending this almost brought tears of desperation to your eyes. His fingers sped up on your clit and your back arched off of the exam chair as an involuntary mewl escaped you. 
“Please let me come.” You whimpered pathetically and he let out a quiet chuckle in response to your brazenness. 
“How curious…” He murmured, gaze dragging all over your body. “I’ll admit, I figured some part of you would enjoy getting to please me, but I never imagined it’d be to this extent.” He said amusedly and your blush darkened in response. “You want to come?”
You were nodding eagerly before he could even finish. “Please.” 
“How about this— I'll raise the grade on your essay… or I’ll let you come.” You could see the barest hint of a smirk on his lips and you let out a frustrated sob, squeezing your eyes shut. “Well?”
“Dr. Crane…” You whimpered, bottom lip trembling as you tried not to cry. When you opened your eyes and stared up at him through the tears, his smirk widened. “Please..” 
“Should I choose for you?” 
“No…” You sobbed, looking away from him and biting your lip. The whole point of this was so he’d change the grade… You can’t give in to the pleasure now that you’re so close to finally getting what you came here for. “I- I want you to change my grade.” Your voice was barely a whisper. As soon as he got your answer, he removed his hand from your clit to grab the top of your thigh again, bucking into you rapidly as he chased his orgasm. 
“We’re going to have a lot of fun together, my little lab rat.” He was clearly satisfied with your choice and while part of you was almost crying from frustration… another part couldn’t help but revel in the fact that you pleased him, even if it was at the expense of your own pleasure. 
His hips snapped into you rapidly, the force of it almost pushing you up the exam chair, but the restraints on your legs kept you mostly in place. As he focused on his impending orgasm, you were practically mesmerized. He looked so… pretty. The pleasure in his expression was obvious and there was a faint blush on his cheeks. His normally pale blue eyes were darker as he took you in, studying every tiny reaction to his ministrations. 
When he suddenly pushed forward all the way and stayed there, you let out a whine of displeasure, knowing whatever pleasure you might’ve been feeling before was about to disappear. But the choked moan he let out as he closed his eyes made you almost forget all about it. His hips bucked forward sporadically as his cock twitched inside you with each rope of come that shot out, filling you up.  
Finally his sounds quieted into heavy breathing and his body went still. You waited anxiously for what was next, not sure what to expect. Opening his eyes again, he watched as he slowly dragged his hips back until his cock slipped free, forcing out a quiet hiss from him and a whimper from you at the sensitivity. 
“Push it out.” His voice was raspy and still thick with arousal. When you pushed his come out, he let out a low groan as he watched, bending down a little to get a closer look. “Good girl.” He cooed, making you whine as the words went straight to your cunt that was still aching with need. 
“You can remain here until the effects wear off. I want to see how long that takes.” He said, almost clinically, while checking his watch. Your eyes stayed on him as he tucked his cock back in his pants before collecting the lube and discarded glove. 
“Are you going to let me go?” Your voice was quiet and timid as submission still heavily clouded your mind. He looked over at you again, almost surprised by your voice. He glanced at the restraints before dragging his gaze all over your body for a moment. Finally, he smirked a little and went back to what he was doing. 
“Soon.” You sighed in response and stayed quiet. As you breathed deeply, trying to ignore the arousal still lingering in your stomach, you noticed that the anxious feeling was starting to subside a little. Your heart was still beating rapidly, but now it was hard to tell if it was from fear, adrenaline, or your own unsatisfied arousal. 
“I think it’s wearing off.” You told him and he checked his watch again. 
“What are you feeling?” He finally walked back over to you and stared at your face with an almost impressive level of professionalism, given the circumstances. 
“My heart is still pounding, but my breathing is better. And I don’t feel very nauseous either.” 
“Next week I want to test this again so I have a control group to compare these results to. It’ll be the same thing, but I won’t finger you for as long and I won’t fuck you until after it wears off.” He reached out and gently grabbed your chin, angling your face up to look at him as he stepped closer. “Of course… that’s assuming you still want to keep your spot in my class…” He trailed off, making the statement sound like a question instead. 
“I do.” You said quickly. Especially after this… you were desperate to stay enrolled in his class, but you were also— as much as you didn’t want to admit it— desperate for more after he gave you this small taste. 
“Good girl.” Your cheeks heated up instantly and he patted one with his hand before stepping back again. “Keep being my little lab rat and I have no doubt you’ll pass my class… maybe even with the grade you think you deserve.” 
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chososluv · 9 months ago
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𝐀 𝐃𝐚𝐲 𝐢𝐧 𝐋𝐢𝐟𝐞 𝐰𝐢𝐭𝐡. . . poly!chosoyuki
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✎₊˚⊹♡ summary & note: in which you are in a beautiful poly relationship with yuki and choso. A FIC i've been sitting on for so long and I'm finally posting so I hope everyone enjoys!! also if anyone knows the owner of the chosoyuki image pls lmk so i can credit !
🏷 tags & warnings: smut 18+, established relationship, heavy on the pet names (pretty girl, peach, plum, pretty boy), tender sex, poly relationship, black fem!reader (referred to as pretty girl), cunnunlingus, dirty talk (teasinggg!!!), chosoyuki take such good care of you rsvp: - aka tagging: @anthoosies @stnexus
✎₊˚  word count: 7.4k
minors do not interact
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Intricate tangles of limbs is what you always wake up to in the morning. 
You feel your nose twitch after a soft tickle graces the tip of it. Mimicking that of a rabbit, your nose danced as you took a deep breath and a familiar scent of mint graced your senses. Without opening your eyes you knew your nose was buried in the dark strands of your boyfriend. His hand rubs gentle circles in your exposed thigh that hugged one of his legs tightly. His gesture arouses you from your sleep and you mumble softly, shifting but you feel another hand on your rear that holds you into place. You didn’t have to open your eyes to know that it is your girlfriend’s sneaky hand cradling your rear in her sleep.
“It’s time to wake up, my loves.” Choso’s soft voice cut through the morning air gently. Since dating it was nonverbally decided that Choso would always be the responsible one to get you two out of bed. If it wasn’t for him, you and Yuki would spend the majority of the day wrapped up in each other’s arms snoring and drooling away.
“Mmmm, Cho.” You softly hum into his hair, your legs squeezing tighter around his leg and your hand that rested on Yuki slowly moves across her body. You realize after a few moments that your hand was resting on her breast. The gentle stroke across her chest caused her to shift, eyes opening as she looked up to see Choso looking down at her. They both blush at one another, dusty rose painting their cheeks as she lifts her head from his chest. Choso smiles sleepily, letting the woman lean up to press her lips against his. They kiss back, but quickly pull away when they hear you let out a snore. 
You had fallen back asleep.
Yuki only smiles, her hand still on your ass and she gives it a squeeze. Your eyes open, jolting widely and you see your two lovers looking at you. You relax, letting your head fall back onto the pillow after sitting it up abruptly with Yuki’s gesture. You smile sheepishly as they grin back at you.
“Morning, my peach.” Choso says, taking his hand from your thigh to caress your cheek. You mewl, falling into his touch as you realize you couldn’t be luckier to wake up to such tender partners. He continues to rub your cheek as Yuki pats gentle on your ass. Both of them continue to coax you into staying awake. A usual part of the morning routine because you were susceptible to falling asleep the quickest and fastest.
Showers together are always eventful. It can be funny and full of laughter, it could be full of kisses and passion, or they could be very decompressing and healing. The three of you always looked after one another and cared for one another’s needs. This morning the shower was soft and tender as for some reason Yuki and Choso decided they both wanted to pamper their baby -- aka you. An occurrence that wasn’t out of the ordinary as that sometimes the two of you liked to hyperfixate on the third person. There wasn’t ever any rules or spoken agreement who would get the pampering when, but being so in tune with one another sometimes two of you knew when the third could use the extra worship.
Today, Yuki and Choso decided it would be you the moment you fell back asleep soundly. A direct result of your busy schedule that left you so horribly fatigued as of late. Your lovers hated seeing you so drained and today they decided they would remedy your stress and woes. 
Yuki places soft kisses on your collarbone as Choso massages soap onto your shoulders. You close your eyes, savoring the moment of Yuki’s lips on your skin and Choso’s skilled fingers working the soap all along your body. His fingers slide from your shoulders to the blades, kneading softly to ease the stress and tension from your muscles. Your head tilts back as he moves to your waist, massaging there as Yuki planted more kisses along your skin. This time she moves to your wet cheeks, peppering them and earning a giggle out of you. 
“What's this all about today?” You ask as Choso and Yuki rinse the soap off of you. Choso only responds with a kiss of your temple before Yuki speaks.
“You’ve been so tired lately, pretty girl,” Yuki pouts, looking at you in the eyes, “we just want to take care of you.” Yuki says with eyes that plead for you to let them continue.
“Yeah,” Choso kisses your temple again, holding you from behind, “let us take care of you, sweet peach.” 
Your heart swells full of love, feeling your eyes prickle at their tenderness and you’re thankful the shower can hide your tears that threaten to spill. You don’t verbally respond, only physically with a smile and a nod.
And you let your lovers continue to take care of you.
The day continues on with them continuing to pamper and spoil you endlessly. After the shower, Yuki cooked breakfast while Choso helped you braid your hair into plaits. You sit on the floor, braiding as you watch the show that was playing on the tv. Choso was a bit more focused, sitting on the couch behind you as he made sure he lathered your hair in product just as you taught him. The demonstration came promptly after he asked to help you since he knew you hated how long it took sometimes to braid your hair into sections. A question that never came up from previous partners of yours and you sat silent, stunned because you had never been asked before.
You think that was the exact moment you fell in love hard with the man.
“Cho, y/n, breakfast is ready!” Yuki sings as she enters the living room, two plates in hand. She sees you’re parked in front of Choso and places the plates onto the coffee table in front of you both. One plate held a delicious helping of eggs and bacon while the other held a generous stack of pancakes. Your stomach suddenly began to sing of its voidness. Yuki kisses the top of your forehead as you feel your cheeks heat up with embarrassment. You look up and offer your lips.
“Thank you, Yuki.” You say after she kisses you. She only grins and kisses you one more time.
“Anything for my pretty girl.” Yuki says. Choso offers his praises next after finishing a braid.
“Thank you, my plum.” He thanks Yuki and the blonde reaches over and kisses him. You can’t help but crane your head to watch them meet lips. The affection happening is so tender and casual, yet you find yourself trying to ignore the tingle that awakened within your belly.
“Anything for my pretty boy.” Yuki sultrily croons and it worsens that tingle for you. Choso says nothing as crimson dusts across his cheekbones. He only asks you to face forward so he can do the last section while you can start eating. You don’t argue and face forward, picking up a utensil and beginning to dig in. Your first target is a big cut of a buttered pancake. Yuki’s cooking sends your taste buds on a trip of delight and you moan at the deliciousness. Yuki giggles, entering the living room with cups of coffee and juice for you all. She joins you on the floor and cuts herself a piece of pancake as you nibble on a piece of bacon. She moans at the outcome, satisfied and you nod as you bring a forkful to Choso's awaiting mouth. He continues to braid your hair as he takes a bite from your fork.
“These are the best pancakes I ever made.” Yuki moans with a mouthful and Choso agrees the second the flavor hits his taste buds.
“Holy shit, plum.” Choso says and you nod as you take another bite of the pancakes.
“Mhmm, baby you cooked.” Taking another bite before you even swallowed the last and Yuki giggles at your antics.
“Slow down, pretty girl, I can always make more. There’s leftover batter.” Yuki says. Love fills your countenance.
“I’m so in love with you.” You sigh, chewing and then swallowing the pancakes. Yuki laughs, thumb reaching out to get the syrup stuck on the corner of your mouth. Choso laughs also, finishing the final braid before sliding down to the other side of you. You sat in the middle of Choso and Yuki now as you three enjoyed breakfast. You fell into a comfortable silence as you three devoured Yuki’s culinary masterpiece.
After eating, Choso cleaned up the dishes while Yuki helped you with the final step of your hair routine and oiled your scalp. Your eyes closed as you felt her gentle fingers massage the product in. You were humming involuntarily and Yuki giggled, reaching down to kiss your forehead. Your eyes open, locking eyes with her and you pucker your lips to her expectation. She’s already landing her lips on yours before you fully pucker them. You two kiss again and you pull away looking at each other before Choso re-enters. He wipes his hands with a towel before speaking.
“Mall date?” He asks and you and Yuki perk up.
“Mall date!” The excitement bursts from your lungs  Choso laughs at the two of you. Yuki and you jump up and throw yourselves onto him. He manages to catch you and throw you over his shoulder before catching and placing Yuki on his hip. He carries the two of you to the room while laughter echoes throughout the apartment. As a home filled with love should. 
The three of you get dressed, you finish first and then Yuki. This isn’t because Choso takes the longest, this is because Choso typically lets you and Yuki get ready first because he loves to watch you guys get ready. He can’t find the words for it, but he knows it feels like a garden of love showered with sunny skies erupts deep within his chest. He feels warm and he wears a lovestruck smile everytime he sees your serious face when you apply makeup or Yuki’s tongue peeking out from her mouth as she focuses on her blackheads. You two mean so much to him and the small things you do makes him love you two even more.
When it’s Choso’s turn, you and Yuki sit on the bed discussing where you were going to hit up first. A makeup store had to be a stop because Choso needed more purple eyeshadow and you needed a refill on your favorite cleanser. You and Yuki jotted that down before looking over in the bathroom at Choso. He was applying product to his hair and as a result the ends spiral into cute little curls. His hair was growing longer and longer these days and they almost dusted his shoulders. You and Yuki look at him, seeing his focused face and you turn to look at Yuki. 
“Our man is so fine.” You say to her and Yuki nods.
“So fine. I be ready to kill a bitch for him.” Yuki confesses and you nod, turning to look at Choso who is oblivious to the conversation right now. He holds a hair tie in his hand, trying to decide if he is going to place his hair in his buns or not. You and Yuki continue to hungrily gaze after Choso unbeknownst to him.
“Can’t play about our pretty boy.” You say and the nickname causes him to look away from his hair tie. He throws a puzzled expression to you and Yuki and you both can’t help but giggle. 
“What?” He asks, raising an eyebrow. Yuki only throws him a look that has his stomach tingling.
“Just talking about how sexy you are.” Yuki says and you nod.
“Yeah and how lucky we are.” You add, also lowering your eyes into that similar gaze Yuki has. You didn’t know you did it, but Choso saw it and it always left him growing restless in his pants.
“Y’all are too funny,” Choso shakes his head blushing, “but should I wear my hair up or down-”
“Down!” Both you and Yuki yell. He blushes more at the enthusiasm and tosses the hair tie back onto the counter. He walks out of the bathroom, dressed and ready to go. You three head out to the local mall, letting Yuki and Choso spoil you with everything from clothing, food, and plushies even. Yuki and you put on fashion shows with Choso who played the supportive boyfriend, grinning from ear to ear at the two of you being dramatic and strutting in the clothes you tried on. He even made you two pose for some photos he decided he needed personally in some of the outfits you both chose. And the mall visit had to end with trying on lingerie for Choso at one of those high end boutiques. 
“Peach, I think Cho would lose his mind if you popped out in this.” Yuki calls after you, showing you a dark green number that would compliment your pretty brown skin. You made a noise of awe, looking at the set that would surely leave him dizzy. You knew you needed to try it on and instantly put the other options you thought you liked back. However, a pretty fuchsia set remained as you handed it to Yuki. 
“And I would lose my mind if you popped out in this.” Yuki eyes at the set, seeing the intricate lace and her eyes lower into a seductive gleam before advancing towards you. You don’t move, letting your girlfriend walk up on you with that look still blazing in her eyes. She lifts her hand up and you think she’s about to take a hold of your chin. To your dismay, she tucks a stray hair behind your ear instead. You look at her as she grins, hearing the small noise that left your throat.
“Let’s try these on and show Cho, hmm?” She asks and you nod as if you were in a trance. Her warm hand takes yours as she leads you to the dressing room. Choso sat on a couch that was in the middle of the changing rooms and he looked up from his phone. He tucks it away when he realizes you two are about to try stuff on. He didn’t want to be distracted by anything else other than what you two had to show him. An eyebrow raised as he steals quick looks at the lace in your hands. You only wink and blow him a kiss before disappearing behind the curtain to try on your set with Yuki.
“Peach. . .” Yuki is in awe when she sees the set on you. The dark green lace swirling and laying elegantly and so sexily against your body. Your supple skin on display and your ass sat delicious and she licks her lips. She can’t stop herself and her fingers are kneading at your thick rear. She bit her lip as she watched it jiggle in her palm. You giggle, taking her hand in yours and she’s forced to look at the rest of the set and she only gets hungrier for you. Your breasts sat pretty and your thighs were calling for her name and you felt the exact same about her.
“Babe, you look so good.” You comment, seeing the way the lively pink complimented her physique. Her muscular thighs called to you, leaving your mouth watering and you only trail your gaze up to her equally as muscular arms. Some of your favorite features about her were those thick muscles, generous rack, and fit rear. You were eager to admit sometimes you acted like a brat to her as an excuse to see her exhibit her strength on you.
“We gotta show Cho.” Yuki says, making you do a 360 and you hear him clear his throat.
“Please. I’m waiting ever so patiently.” He says from the curtain and you two give him the okay to poke his head in. 
When he does, he never wants to poke his head back out.
“Oh fuck, my babies.” Choso steps into the fitting room, not caring if anyone saw him disappear in the room with you guys. Choso can’t figure out where to look first between you and Yuki. Yuki’s breast sat peaky but your ass also called out to him. He felt his crotch growing stiff as a look passed over him. 
“What do you think, Babe?” Yuki asks and Choso licks lips. His tattoo across his bridge grows darker by the seconds.
“I think my girls are trying to kill me.” Choso says and you and Yuki snicker. You step forward, walking up to Choso and placing your hands on his chest. He looks down at you and his look alone sends butterflies migrating south between your legs.
“You would be right, baby.” You say and Choso’s hand falls on your ass, giving it a squeeze as he smirks at you. You bite your lip, holding a moan as he pinches it. He looks at Yuki as she eyes at you two hungrily. You turn your head to look at her and then look back at Choso. 
“Doesn’t Peach look stunning in the set I picked?” Yuki asks, walking up behind you and Choso nods.
“Could eat our pretty peach right here.” Choso’s words cause your face to heat up and you aren’t given a chance to recover before Yuki has a hand on your ass cheek, giving it a squeeze.
“I second that.” Yuki says, coming beside you and you shake your head.
“But Yuki...” You’re stuck on your girlfriend with the sexy pink set she wore but Choso didn’t forget about her either. 
“I could eat her too.” Choso says, smirking and Yuki actually blushes at the forwardness. Choso hasn’t been subtle since he saw you two — the lingerie clearly has him acting up. You look between Choso and Yuki, enjoying the stunned look on her face. It was rare she wasn’t prepared with a quip but today was one of those rare days. But, she manages to get her composure together before that seductive look passes over.
“I’d bet you both would love that,” she takes control again and has both of you blushing, “but instead we’re going to feed our peach because that stomach is growling.” Yuki shoots you a look and you pout at her. 
“But wait I don’t even know how much this set cost-” Choso cuts you off.
“I don’t even care how much,” he’s quick to eliminate your concerns, “let's get them and go, so we can feed you.” 
Choso doesn’t need to tell you twice.
After the lingerie store, you three manage to have a romantic dinner on the way home. The entire dinner is thick with sexual tension, a direct result of moment in the dressing room. You sat between Choso and Yuki at the restaurant of your choice since today was still about you. Yuki had a testy hand on your thigh the entire evening but you can’t say you were any better. Your hand rested just as questionably high as you gave her doe eyes throughout the entire evening. Though Choso was better at keeping his composure he was still no better than you two. He had a hand up the back of your shirt tracing shapes along your spine and erecting goosebumps. You were tucked into his side as he and Yuki had verbal banter. Their personal way of foreplay as they touched on you gently. 
It was heaven, yet torture at the same time because you knew you grew increasingly aroused in your panties with the anticipation of being touched. You managed to survive dinner but only to have Yuki continue to touch you and flirt with you badly on the drive home.
“I wonder how wet our peach is, Cho.” Yuki had said on the drive back as her hands continued to trail along your thigh. Choso chuckles sensually, a deep rumble in his chest as he watches you two in the rear view mirror. You two were in the backseat so Yuki could keep her hands on you. She kisses along your neck as you let out a mewl.
“Can’t wait to find out.” He says and you feel your skin prickle all over.
You get back to your shared home before you know it. Yuki has your hand in hers as she guides you to the bathroom to freshen up. The two of you have a quick shower, prepping for the intimate night you had been anxious about for a few hours now. You took your hair from the braids, curls and coils springing loose and Yuki helps as she watches in awe. It’s been awhile since you two have been dating yet she never ceases to be amazed by your hair behavior. It’s flattering to see her resemble the look of a child seeing magic for the first time.
“My pretty girl always lives up to her name.” Yuki says, wrapping arms around you from behind when you two finished and you giggle at her compliment. You two sway lovingly as she kisses your shoulder before patting your ass. Choso enters the bathroom for his turn to shower, seeing you two in an embrace and he smiles lovingly to himself. 
“My pretty girls.” Choso says, kissing your foreheads before starting to shower himself. You two stare after him, seeing his muscular build and naked ass disappear into the shower. His semi-hard flesh did not go unnoticed and you and Yuki shared a look of lust. You two exit your embrace to finish getting dressed. You both exit the bathroom, leaving Choso as you two settle on the bed to face one another.
“Is it bad I can’t wait?” You admit shamelessly. Yuki only laughs sensually, she rises to her hunches and your breathing hitches. The sensual lighting in the room captures her fuschia set so well and you mentally pat yourself on the back for picking it out. The lace in the bust shows her pretty erect nipples and you feel a twitch beneath your thighs.
“It is your day, pretty girl,” Yuki grabs you by your face with one hand. She brings you close to her lips before speaking, “I’m happy to do the honors of spoiling you first.”
And spoil you first did she.
“Yuki.” You moan ever so gently, eyes closed tightly as you throw your head back. Her lips dance along the column of your throat, teeth coming out to suck on your sweet spot. You let a sharp breath of air as your back arches off the bed. The blonde smirks against your pulse, licking up the vein as a carnal hand finds home between your thighs. Another mewl leaves your lips as you feel pleasure on your clit, even if it's over your underwear.
“Soaked through already? You’re so good to me, pretty girl, thank you.” Yuki praises you as her fingers dipped down to find the cloth covering your hole soaked. You feel hot with her praises, that knot forming in your core and you only wanted Yuki to help you chase after it. Your hips move before you answer.
“Yuki, I need more, please.” The kisses and heavy petting wasn’t enough anymore you needed to feel her directly on you. Yuki only shook her hand, delivering an apologetic kiss to the bruising spat on your throat. 
“Cho would want you to wait for him, Peach,” Yuki says soothingly and suddenly the water cuts off in the ensuite, “only a little bit longer.” You want to whine but you hear the sliding glass door drawing back in the bathroom and you can only picture Choso is moving at the speed of lightning. The image of his semi-hard cock flashes in your brain the same time Yuki presses a hard circle into your clit. You whimper and arch off the bed.
“Need it now.” You mewl and Yuki moves her face from your neck. The bathroom door opens and you both turn to see Choso emerge, body dripping as he dries himself off. His semi-hard now completely hard and you can’t help but wonder if his thoughts got to him and he got busy in the shower.
“Need what now, peach?” Choso asks, smirking as he dries his hair and you and Yuki lick your lips at his hardened flesh.
“We need you, pretty boy.” Yuki says sensually, extending a hand out when Choso finishes drying himself. He tosses the towel to the side, hair still damp but down and long. His tattoo across his bridge looked so dark as he approached you two. He climbs on the bed, crashing his lips to Yuki’s and the woman moans. You join her, the sight hot and you bring a needy hand down to your panties. You slip a hand underneath the lace and moan the second the pad of your finger touches your swollen clit. The sudden melodic sound causes Yuki and Choso to break their kiss. They see you touching yourself and a lustful look passes over both their eyes.
“Let us do the work, Peach.”
“Yeah, pretty girl.”
Heaven felt like an understatement to what you felt.
The soft sensual kisses and gentle caresses left you chasing your ecstacy gradually with your lovers. Their hands all over your body as they slowly peeled you of your lingerie. Your panties were pulled to the side and straps of the bustier were pulled down, exposing your brown nipples to the air. Choso had your right nipple while Yuki had the left. Their hot tongues swirling along your sensitive buds as Choso’s thick fingers ministrated deep in your folds and Yuki’s nimble finger circles your clit. The stimulation left you singing praises as your thighs gradually began to shake.
“She’s shaking so bad, Cho.” Yuki teases, the other hand rubbing up and down your thigh and you mewl defensively. They both chuckle at you before he releases your nipple, a lewd pop as his saliva coated his pretty swollen lips.
“I feel her twitching and she’s sucking me so tight,” he looks at you but your eyes are closed, “I think Peach has been waiting for this all day.” He teases, feeling the way your cunt softly sucks him in and drenches him at the same time. His words about you only make you moan, sucking him in even tighter and he groans, cock twitching and threatening to pebble precum at any moment.
“I think so too. Look how big and swollen her clit is. I just wanna suck on it all night.” Yuki moans, rubbing her thighs together and before she can stop herself she’s pulling the panties off you. Choso takes that time to unclasp your bra to toss that off you as well. You’re naked before them and Yuki’s blonde locks are ducking between your thighs as she does just what she wished and sucks on your clit.
“Yuki!” Her warm mouth on your clit finally left you squirming, trying to get away from how fucking good her tongue felt but she hooked her strong arms on your thighs to hold you in place. Choso continues to shower your breasts with affection, teeth on your nipple as he sucked and between both of their mouths on you they were set to drive you wild. 
You let the sensation continue to elevate your pleasure. Yuki continues sucking on your clit, hips still bucking in her hold but she’s stronger. She keeps you in place and you helplessly whine out slurs of her and Choso’s names. The male nips at your breast, hearing the way you say his name before climbing up your body.
“So pretty when you moan, Peach.” Choso praises in your ear as he licks your shell. Yuki’s tongue circles your swollen flesh and both sensations leave you sighing.
“I need someone to fuck me.” You announce, whimpering pathetically but Yuki ceases her tongue on you and Choso moves his face from outside your neck. Yuki climbs up your body, licking your cum off her lips and the sight makes your stomach flip flop. They both come to opposite cheeks kissing them before Choso speaks.
“We won’t fuck you, but we’ll make love to you tonight, peach.” Choso promises and Yuki hums, kissing your shoulder. You look at Choso and Yuki, smiling softly.
“Then please make love to me.” Are the last words spoken before you three share a kiss. Yuki is shredded of her clothes and you take Choso’s lap, sheathing his thick cock in you and he lets out a sharp breath. You moan, letting him stretch and fill you as you watch Yuki mount his face and turn to you. Her clit brushes against Choso’s lips and opens his mouth, taking her pretty clit between his lips and sucking harshly. Yuki croons in pleasure and you join her. You begin sinking your hips up and down Choso’s length as every part of him hits that spot. You bring a hand to your clit, rubbing circles as you watch Yuki ride his face. She leaves a soft sheen on his chin from her wet cunt. The scene is too erotic for you and your folds quiver.
The three of you continue to make love. Your hips continue to rock in a sensual manner. Soft and tender moans pour out of you as the head of Choso’s cock nudged deep inside. Yuki continues to be consumed in her own pleasure, watching you gracefully rock on Choso’s cock. She lets out a whimper when Choso’s tongue flicks against her clit just right. The sound doesn’t fall on deaf ears and he repeats the motion again. Yuki moans, hips rocking faster and you grab her by the back of her neck to kiss her. Tongues are dancing, swirling as spit dribbles from the sides and Choso can only listen to you two kiss messily. His cock jumps in your cunt and he thrusts up in you. You moan against Yuki’s lips at the sudden motion and cry out when he does it again. He thrusts deeper and you break the kiss as you double over, losing your breath.
“Cho-So!” You squeal, his hips rutting up into you again and again. You didn’t expect him to start placing his attention on you, but when you saw Yuki dismount his face you couldn’t help but feel like this was planned. Suspicions confirmed when he sat up and merely twisted you two around. Suddenly he was on top as your head laid in Yuki’s lap. He thrusts into you gently, and tenderly, rolling his hips to earn a sensual cry from your lips. You throw your head in Yuki’s lap as she caresses your breasts tenderly. 
“You guys planned this!?” You accuse but pleasure does not leave your tone. Choso and Yuki only grin, stealing a look at one another before Yuki speaks.
“It was Choso’s idea to ambush you,” Yuki says, “now hush and let us pleasure you, baby girl.” A pinch of your nipple and roll of Choso’s hips left you asking no more questions. Choso moans, pelvis slapping against the apex of your thighs as you start to wet the sheets.
“Mmmnhgg—Fuck!” You’re a mess as you arch your back, the crown of his cock kissing further within you. That spot that left shocks radiating throughout your core. Your thighs were twitching and Yuki kissed all over your face as you chased that euphoria.
“Think our baby is close,” Yuki comments, “can’t stay still.” She points out your squirming. Your hips buck and when she places a finger on your clit you let out a cry as your legs start to shake. She circles feverishly, eager to earn mewls out of you and she is pleased when you sigh out her name. Between her quick fingers and Choso’s member deep in you, you knew you would be within reach of euphoria.
“Mmm–I’m so close!” You cry and Choso answers with a groan before speaking.
“Such a good little peach,” Choso suddenly draws his hips back, leaving his thick crown at your entrance before sliding back in and bottoming out, the sensation causing you to wail beneath him, “want you to cum for me and Yuki, hmm?” He repeats his stroke, sliding out almost completely to slide back fully in. The feeling of him leaving almost completely left you empty, but the moment he filled you to the brim you felt an indescribable sensation. A heavy euphoric feeling spreads throughout your core as you hear soft gushing from your cunt. Choso continues to grunt above you and it only makes you even more turned on. 
“Please, pretty girl. Been so good for us.” Yuki encourages you, licking along your neck before biting down. You cry out, back arching at the sting of discomfort that was steadily replaced with elation. Your eyes roll back and Yuki sucks on your neck. Her finger rubs faster and Choso decides to press your legs into the mattress, removing them from his waist and opening you up for him and Yuki. You whimper as you feel explicit, wide open and on display. The new placement allows you to feel the girth of Choso and you grip hard on his biceps. You feel so full.
“Cho–Fucknnng!” Choso stares at you falling apart beneath him, lips bruised and swollen from kissing and biting. Your eyes are screwed shut with your face twisted in raw pleasure. He bit his lip to keep from cumming, his body reacting to your expressions and sinful sounds pouring from your lips. Choso’s so in love with you, passion overtaking and he rolls his hips faster but still keeps the pace sensual. He’s still determined to make love to you tonight. 
“Grippin’ me so fucking tight, Peach.” Choso groans out, knowing you were fixing to come with the way your cunt hugged him tightly. Not only that but your clit was so pretty and puffy in Yuki’s fingers as she continued to rub it. You fight against his hold, thighs shaking as you want to wrap your legs around to brace yourself for the blinding release that was within your reach. You could taste it, goosebumps skating down your spine as you let out a lusty scream. 
“Chosyukii!” You slur both their names, eyes rolling back as release crashes into you. Yuki moves her fingers from your clit and Choso lets go of your legs. You immediately trap him in them, sinking and pulling him deep in you. He bottoms out, crown sinking in your pulsing walls that continue to squeeze him as you continue to cum around him.
“Fuck.” Choso sighs, feeling your cunt slowly let up on his cock but he doesn’t move. He knew if he moved the slightest bit too quick he would be spilling himself inside you. You let your last pants out and he manages to muster his composure enough to slide out with no incident. He looks down at you, seeing your eyes still closed as you collect your breath. He places a gentle hand on your cheek, grabbing your attention and you open your eyes.
“So good, Peach.” He praises you and you respond with a mewl. He leans down, kissing you on the lips twice. You hum, pulling him in to kiss him a third time before moving away from his face. You look up to see Yuki looking down at the both of you with all the love in the world..
“I love you two.” Yuki says and the two of you smile back at her.
“We love you, now get over here I didn’t forget about you.” Choso says, rising on his hunches and you roll out from underneath him. You two reach for Yuki at the same time, making her take your place on her back. Your mouth is on her nipples, kissing and sucking on them as Choso slips into her easily, cock still slick from you cumming on him. Yuki moans and judging by the octave alone you and Choso knew she wasn’t going to last long. Her pleasure stimming from taking care of you displayed as her cunt let out heavy squelching when Choso rocked into her.
“Mmm, oh my god.” Yuki moans, feeling the way Choso’s cock rocks into her and your hot mouth on her sensitive nipples. She looks down, making eye contact with you as you keep sucking on her softly. Her eyes drift down to see where Choso met her pelvis, cock disappearing between her folds as her lover panted out profanities. 
“Feel so fucking good, plum.” Choso grunts through clenched teeth and you nip on her bud. Your finger slips down to her engorged clit, massaging and causing Yuki to clamp down on Choso. He swears once more and Yuki arches.
“Gonna,” she moans, “fucking cum.” Yuki hisses out, strong thighs quivering and you move your mouth from her nipple. You look up at the woman, seeing her eyes watching your every move before you surge forward. Your lips are on hers and her fingers become tangled in your dense curls, pulling on the strands as she devours your taste. You let Yuki dominate you, tongue dancing in a passionate twist and you so desperately fought to keep up. You let out soft moans and she smirks against your lips. She pulls away from you, acting as if she were to speak but then a sudden cry ripped through. Her body twitched, back lifting off the bed and Choso’s moans got louder. 
“You cummin’, plum?” Choso asks and Yuki answers with an iron grip placed on his ass. She squeezes and begins slamming his hips harder against her. Choso lets out a whine at her force, dick becoming overstimulated with the feeling of Yuki’s soft cunt milking him as she came. He couldn’t hold back much longer and with Yuki’s demanding way of telling him to go faster he felt his head spinning.
“You cummin, Cho?” Yuki asks breathlessly, eyes low from her orgasm haze and you reach up, leaving Yuki to place kisses on Choso’s shoulders. Your fingers come to his pierced nipples, earning another moan from Choso. You roll the erect nubs and cold metal between your fingers as you zero in on his neck. You lick along his vein, causing the man to shudder as you slowly trail your muscle up the shell of his ear. You nip around the metal of one of his cartilage rings and he was set to lose his mind.
Then you spoke.
“Cum for us, pretty boy.”
And he does. Hard.
Choso moans, whining out Yuki and your names as he emptied himself inside her. The sounds are so sonically pleasing to you and Yuki, causing you both to smile. He bucks sloppily into Yuki as the pair hold eye contact. Her sultry expression caused him to swear. You start to plant kisses along his cheek then trail to his shoulder and then his bicep. He slides from Yuki, hissing as his cum dribbles out and she sits up. She grabs onto his cheeks, kissing him several times as you continue to shower him with gentle kisses. The both of you easing him out of his orgasm as he came back down from the euphoric high. He kisses Yuki and then you before sighing out dramatically. Yuki and you giggle pressing kisses to his cheeks as he wraps arms around you two. 
“Mhmm, love you, pretty boy.” Yuki ceases her kisses on his cheeks allowing him to turn his head to kiss her. A loud smooch sounding and you smile at your lovers.  
“I love you too.” Choso says and he turns to look at you, stars in his eyes before he speaks to you.
“And I love you, especially.” Choso kisses your nose and Yuki hums in agreement.
“Yeah, our pretty baby.” Yuki mimics those similar stars, leaving Choso’s side to join you at your vacant one. You feel that similar love you woke up to this morning. That gentle love and admiration channeled through generous affection. Kisses were placed at your temples that left you cheesing so hard it hurt your lips.
“I love you guys.” You beam, causing the two of them to coo over you and shower your face with kisses. You giggle, causing Yuki and Choso to laugh along with you. Choso finishes a wet smooch against your forehead before speaking.
“Why don’t I run a bath so we can use that pretty bath bomb you picked out earlier? How’s that sound, peach?” Choso rubs a soft circle in your back and you look up at him. You nod, smiling big once again.
“That sounds good, Cho.” You say as Yuki places a kiss on your shoulder. Choso places one last kiss on your forehead before departing from your side. Part of you yearns for him to come back, missing his warmth and presence next to you. It begins to make you feel empty to a degree.
“You feeling okay, pretty girl?” Yuki checks in, rubbing up and down your back. You look over at her, seeing her cast a caring gaze over you. Her other hand comes out to gently massage the bruises that slowly formed from where she or Choso might have gripped you too tight. You smile softly, seeing the way she looks after you and always checks in after sex.
“Yeah. I feel good, plum. Do you?” You ask and she smiles from ear to ear, grinning as she nods. She has to steal one more kiss from you before verbally answering.
“Always good when my pretty girl is good.” She smiles, placing a stray hair back into place before Choso tells you both the bath is ready.
The three of you settle into a roomy jacuzzi tub before Yuki and Choso place you between them. Choso has the front, washing your legs as Yuki has the back, washing your back and neck. You do nothing but sit there, allowing both of your lovers to wash your body. All the stress from the past week seemed to break down and completely dissolve as they rinsed your body. Your mind is easing to the highest form of comfort, drifting away as they continue to wash your woes away. 
“Yuki…” Choso is fighting a laugh, biting his lip and Yuki looks over your head to arch an eyebrow. 
“What?” She’s still rubbing soap in your shoulders.
“Y/n fell asleep…” A chuckle escapes but he quickly closes his mouth. Yuki, interested, manages to crane her neck around to catch a glimpse of your face. Her bottom lip wobbles, snort escaping as she sees your face completely slack. However, a silly smile is still on your face.
“Baby.” Yuki gently shakes you and you jolt.
“Huh!?” You realize you drifted off, looking up to see Choso laughing at you and Yuki bursts into giggles. You can’t help but laugh at yourself but you shrug.
“It ain't my fault Choso’s dick puts me to sleep.” You pout and your boyfriend smirks but blushes ever-so-slightly.
“Choso ‘bomb dick’ Kamo.” Yuki laughs as she rinses your shoulders off. You can’t help but giggle at that one and Choso blushes more.
“Ay thank you loves I aim to please.” He says humbly before rinsing your chest off. You and Yuki hum in approval before continuing to bathe.
You manage to survive the rest of the bath without falling asleep. After getting out, night routines were in order and pajamas were put on. You secure the bonnet on your head and settle on the bed with Choso and Yuki. They part one another, making you fall in the middle between them. Choso pulls you against his back, spooning you as Yuki settles in front. You and Yuki face one another and she throws an arm over both you and Choso before adding her leg to the tangle of limbs between you and Choso. 
You feel instant warmth and security from both of your lovers. Choso’s warm and strong back with Yuki’s tender strokes on your leg made you feel that love and comfort you only read about in books or saw on film. That love that was so rare and so pure, so raw that it felt unobtainable because surely no one was really made for one another, right? 
Before Choso and Yuki, you would have agreed. 
But now? You were a believer in soulmates. You believed you found your perfect lovers and couldn’t be happier with anyone else. You couldn’t imagine life with anyone but Choso and Yuki.
And you wouldn’t trade them for anything in the world. 
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©𝐜𝐡𝐨𝐬𝐨𝐬𝐥𝐮𝐯 ╰┈┈➤ MASTERLIST!
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seat-safety-switch · 6 months ago
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In order to stay relatable, I like to figure out what the average person hates so I can hate it too. Taxes are always popular, but for some reason people get tired of listening to me when I start discussing the specific methodologies of estimating land value, and how it should really not include properties with several broken Mopars to be "valuable." So I have to figure out some alternatives. The weather, the local sports team, and weeds.
Weeds, you ask? Weeds, I reply. In my idyllic-if-you-squint neighbourhood, there is a secret battle being fought beneath all of our feet. Brave suburbanite warriors struggle valiantly to keep plants they don't want from growing in between the plants they do want. It doesn't help that the former plants are really good at growing, and the latter are simply not. Seems unfair to me, but so is a lot of life, so I got a book from the public library and started boning up on my weeds.
Friends, it turns out that you can bury yourself into an infinitely deep taxonomy of various plants that are distinguishable only by the slightest feature. And all of those plants are greatly undervalued by society. Just like owning Malaise Era Mopars. I was hooked. Suddenly, I found myself walking around my neighbourhood, stopping to gaze at the specific varieties of dandelion, thistle, weird lumpy thing, and Sow's Murderess that dotted the environs.
And yet, despite my greater knowledge, success in social interaction still refused to come. In fact, I now have even greater friction with local by-law, because it turns out they really don't like it when you argue that your property isn't "overgrown with weeds" but instead temporarily colonized by a variety of pollinator-friendly invasive species that the city themselves put there a hundred years ago. I made the lawn-control lady so mad that she drove into a lamp post peeling out of my driveway.
There is good news, though. What was left of her city-allocated Dakota provided a pretty decent 5.2 for my stricken Valiant, and doing the swap immediately raptured me back from caring about all those dumb plants. Thanks, hyperfixation.
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tobyscloset · 6 months ago
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I am going to talk about my favourite things from chaos theory and of course, the downsides, and my personal opinions!! (Opinions based around the benrius/yasammy topic) So major spoilers ahead under the cut!
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Goodsides :D
While chaos theory is a kids show, it definitely displays more mature content, something camp cretaceous did not show! This includes blood, and visual character death (Daniel Kons was specifically gruesome), and description of mental issues, this is specifically PTSD, implied depressive states and breakdowns, the show dives deep into the world of surprise, watching it i was shocked in a good way when a scene came up. Kenji's breakdown was perfectly animated and portrayed.
Each character never faded into the background and they were all equally focused on throughout the season. The show also focused on relationships between the campers, and their families. Specifically Sammy's. Each character has their own comical relief line even when in a dangerous situation. The campers never matured, only grew, they stayed themselves and still act as a group! Same way they did on Nublar.
The plot twists are bonkers, I was not expecting the DPW to be up to sketchy business, nor did I expect suddenly blossoming romance between characters. The budget is definitely higher than it was with camp cretaceous, I couldn't tell if some scenes were animated or real. Beautifully portrayed landscapes.
Overall, the show deserved every amazing rating and my personal rating is an 11/10.
Downsides D:
My first itch was the one-sided romance with Darius and Brooklynn. It certainly was a plot twist but I feel that it was absolutely unnecessary and could've been kept platonic. I feel it would be more heartbreaking and deep if Darius sent her voice messages as a friend, telling her that he's sorry and telling her things about his day. That one scene threw me off on the episode, not because I'm an angry benrius shipper but because it very much could've been kept platonic and felt unnecessary, but was written and played into perfectly. I have absolutely no criticism of the actual writing.
(this was talked about on the discord) - It feels like Brooklynn used to be independent and a baddie in camp cretaceous until she started becoming the love interest, and then it felt like she just became dependent on Kenji and unable to do things herself, so I am hoping that if we get a season 2, that we really get to see Brooklynn not be the love interest and work independently. And I genuinely hope that it won't turn out into another klance situation with Brooklynn, because she was super overhated before, and some angry benrius/benji shippers WILL hate her for "getting in the way of a mlm ship", which is not the case.
My last point was with Darius' health. Darius never got that shine through and we really never got to see how he coped with Brooklynn's death or after the island. They show little cracks but never unpack his full health, which I do hope we get to see in future seasons.
Other than those three points, I really do have nothing to criticise because it was perfect.
Personal opinions/hopes on ships :3
I really do hope we get to see more yasammy content specifically how they build up their relationship more, especially comforting scenes like we got in Ben's soggy van. And Sammy telling Yaz about her family not being in contact, and I would really love to see their relationship play out further and elaborate on the family situation!! :)
-
As I autismed a little too hard and have had a hyperfixation on Benrius since 2021(?), it's not to say I didn't have my hopes up for their relationship in chaos theory, but I also can't say that I expected them to be canon. What maybe the directors could've done is provide that teeny bit of fan-headcanons, because from what I've seen, alot of people from the fandom headcanoned Ben as a gay man, so instead of a girlfriend he would've had a boyfriend. Or they could have Ben lie about the girlfriend because he may have worked out he likes boys, and has internalised homophobia. But back to benrius, they had ALOT of chemistry in camp cretaceous, and for me it was a little disappointing that their relationship dwindled down a little. What I am hoping (manifesting) is that Ben realises his feelings for Darius, and has issues coming out to him and confessing.
Despite my opinions and criticism, the show is definitely worth the watch and deserves every thumbs up from the viewers. I thank everyone who worked on chaos theory and put their best effort into it. 11/10 show. Thank you.
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psiroller · 7 months ago
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in which chilchuck tries to get some but ends up a sucker to his caretaker instinct once again
i just wanted to write something where chilchuck unironically indulges laios' hyperfixation, lol. im folding this into something larger but it kind of stands on its own for now, so here.
“Hey,” Chilchuck slurred. An arm crawled around Laios’ shoulder, stirring him from his reading. “What are you doing up? It’s my shift.”
“Just research,” Laios replied cheerily. His eyes were drawn back to the book and away from Chilchuck, something that elicited a soft huff of irritation. “I’ll still be good to take over for you. I’m kind of wound up, you know? Couldn’t sleep.”
“Yeah,” Chilchuck snickered, his hand brushing across Laios’ chest with just a bit too much pressure to be purely friendly. “I’ve been wound up, too.”
Laios met Chilchuck’s lascivious gaze with concern. “Are you starving yourself again? You wouldn’t have such bad insomnia if you ate well.”
“I got wine, there’s nutrients in that,” Chilchuck giggled, giving Laios’ tit a fond pat. Laios smelled the drink on his breath and the hair on his neck stood on end.
“On an empty stomach? Chil…” “What you getting worked up for? I’m fine. I know what I’m doing.”
Laios’ brows furrowed. Chil stared up at him, waiting for him to back down, and the smug smirk only widened when he didn’t.
“You gonna force-feed me or something? I didn’t take you as into that kind of thing.” “Knowing how depraved you are, you’d enjoy it if I did.” Chilchuck scoffed. “Oh, yeah, you’re one to talk—”
Laios closed his book. “You’re being reckless,” he declared, in that know-it-all leader tone. Rarely used—Laios hated using it—but terse enough for Chilchuck to tilt his head and shut his mouth for a minute. Not long enough.
“Being a little tipsy doesn’t mean my eyes and ears don’t work,” Chilchuck groaned, pulling away and slumping onto the next step up from the one he was perched on.  “It’s not my job to fight them anyway. All I gotta do is throw the bottle at your head and I’ve done my part.” “I’m not talking about the party, Chil.”
Chilchuck shrunk away from Laios and crossed his arms.
“When did you become such a nag?” Chilchuck groaned. “I’m older than you. I know my limits.”
Laios turned from his seat on the floor, rising on his knees, invading Chilchuck’s space. He braced his arms on either side of Chilchuck’s lap.
“Do I have to say why?” Laios rumbled. “If you don’t want me to care, stop making passes at me.”
Chilchuck clucked his tongue. “Didn’t have to hit on you to get you to take a few quills to the back for my bony ass.” “So much for never talking about that again.”
Chilchuck grinned. Laios’ eye twitched, knowing that Chil knew he’d taken the bait. Chilchuck reached up to cup Laios’ face; Laios let him, unfortunately.
“You can relax, big guy,” Chilchuck said, and the softness in his voice made Laios deflate all at once. “I got by just fine until you hired me. I’m not going anywhere.”
“I want to believe you,” Laios murmured. Chilchuck could feel the muscles of his jaw working as he spoke, the weight of his heavy tallman skull in his palms. “I do. But you don’t know—" “I’m fine,” Chilchuck asserted. “What’s got you so…?”
He stopped, bit his tongue. Laios looked up at him with those insufferable, upturned puppy dog eyes, deep amber in the low firelight, and he remembered. Chilchuck let out a long-suffering sigh, stroked up his cheek into Laios’ hair and scratched his scalp.
“We got this,” Chilchuck said. “It’ll be alright.” Laios slumped forward into Chilchuck’s lap, thick jaw slamming down onto his legs like a harpsichord lid, and Chilchuck squawked. Laios turned his face into the loose-fitting, threadbare slacks Chilchuck normally wore to bed, sucking in a long breath that made his back rise and then letting it all out through his nose. It reminded Chilchuck of Leed’s wargs after a good dinner, resting their big, wrinkly heads on any friendly knee and whining for attention.
Chilchuck scratched at his sideburns. He knew propositioning Laios would be risky in the dungeon, but this wasn’t the kind of disaster he’d envisioned if it went wrong. His hand came to rest on Laios’ back, and he rubbed it along the length of Laios’ spine. Laios’ broad body sunk that much further into his lap. Chilchuck’s calves were going numb, but he held deathly stll, as if he’d scare Laios off. As if he didn’t want to scare Laios off and get out of this mess.
“We’ll find Falin,” Chilchuck said. “We did it before, and we’ll do it again.” Neither of them believed it, really, but it was a nice thought. Maybe if they chanted it enough a spell would be cast. No mana sickness yet; they’d have to keep at it.
“I’m pretty confident about that,” said Laios, muffled in Chilchuck’s legs. His breath puffed warm on his thighs in short, controlled breaths. “But if we do and we don’t get her, if the Mad Mage takes care of us, then—it’s not just Falin, anymore.”
Chilchuck’s breath caught. His fingers curled in Laios’ shirt and tugged fitfully. Laios didn’t budge.
“She used to be all I had, you know.” Laios hugged Chilchuck’s pins-and-needles calves, which further trapped him but also returned some level of blood flow. Small blessings. Chilchuck wished he were dead. “That was fine. It was—better that way. Less to worry about. Then I found a nice girl, and I proposed—"
“Wait, what?”
“—she was so cute, so nice to me, but when my father said Falin would have to leave, I couldn’t just leave my little sister to rot somewhere, so—I broke it off. It didn’t matter, if I could earn enough money and Falin would be okay—”
Try faking a heart attack. You have the plausible deniability. “He… sent Falin away?” He was dimly aware of Marcille and Falin having met at magic school. “You were supporting her?”
“—but I didn’t even—need to. She was happy where she was. And I still—I still dragged her here, let her get eaten, let the Mad Mage take her. What kind of brother—”
Chilchuck gripped the back of Laios’ skull and pulled at his hair, not enough to move him, but enough to shut him up. He let go and ruffled it instead, soothing out the tension in his scalp. Laios melted, limbs melting to the stone tunnel floor.
“I see why you’ve been so wound up,” Chilchuck said. “You’ve just been sitting here and spiraling. Are you even reading that book?”
Laios squeezed Chilchuck’s legs to his chest. “Not really. I’m looking at the words but I’m not… retaining anything.”
That’s bad. “Let me see it.” Laios looked up at Chilchuck with confusion, then distrust. “Please?” That only confused Laios further, but he lifted the worn old tome from the floor for Chilchuck to take.
“Dragons of the Eastern Archipelago,” Chilchuck read out. “Another cookbook, eh?”
The jocular tone whiffed right past Laios’ ears. “It’s… not really research,” he admitted. Chilchuck thumbed through the pages—there were many detailed technical sketches of long-bodied, short-limbed dragons with horsehair and deer antlers, strange boggling eyes and stretched lips. More impressionistic doodles filled the margins, with scrawled-circle eyes and jagged teeth, little flared scratches of the broad side of a pencil representative of dragon fire. Their fat snake bodies had wobbly, uneven sides and sloppily looping scales—but some were a little more distinguishable as a dragon than others.
“Ah.” Chilchuck cleared his throat. “Nothing wrong with a little light reading, I guess.” He tried on a smile. “The, uh, pictures are nice.” “I kept telling Falin that long don’t breathe fire,” Laios said, voice tight, “but she kept saying it would be cooler if they did.” “That’s what they’re called? Longs? Seems kind of on-the-nose.”
That managed to get a laugh out of Laios, but it sounded more exasperated than anything. “It’s just one of the native words used for them, but it’s not Shuro’s language, apparently. The word he uses is ryu.”
“I haven’t seen anydragons other than red and green. Maybe it’s just the dungeons I’ve been to.” Chilchuck said. He winced, realizing he’d just stumbled over a lecture topic, but Laios stayed folded across his lap, seemingly having gotten comfortable there, and stayed quiet. The silence made Chilchuck’s hair bristle. Chilchuck nudged him, knuckles against Laios’ temple.
“C’mon, man, I set you up. Go on.” “Now you’re just making fun of me.” “Seriously, Laios. I really want to know this time, and you’re gonna sulk about it?”
Laios turned up from his lap to read Chilchuck’s face, though he never seemed to be able to get it right all the other times he’d attempted it. Chilchuck heaved a melodramatic sigh and patted Laios’ head, an action that lowered his hackles. It really shouldn’t have worked that easily, but Laios closed his eyes and hummed.
“There are… so many kinds,” Laios said dreamily. Dread began to creep in on Chilchuck’s charitable mood, but he’d talked himself into a corner. “They’re super adaptable. Pretty much anywhere you have a dungeon or an ecosystem robust enough to support one, you can find a dragon.”
“I’ve, uh, heard about white dragons. Furry ones, kind of like these guys, but with wings and the stocky body type. Never seen one, though, so it could have been bullshit.” “Oh, they’re real. Pretty common up north.” “Do they really breathe ice? How does that work?”
“Basically, yeah. It’s super-cooled air. They have huge lungs and a fuel organ like a red dragon, but instead of burning the waste matter inside, it liquefies it into a kind of slurry—” Chilchuck grimaced, but Laios was already talking with his hands and not measuring Chilchuck’s enthusiasm. “—that undergoes a rapid chemical reaction when exposed to the air the dragon exhales.”
“Huh.” Chilchuck absently stroked the back of Laios’ neck. Laios squirmed, but didn’t complain. He slipped out of his kneeling position to sit flatter against the wall, head still flopped over Chilchuck’s lap but looking outward toward the fire. The angle looked uncomfortable, so Chilchuck dropped a step lower, letting Laios slide over just a bit more, lay more solidly in Chilchuck’s lap. Laios’ ears had turned red. “Y’know, I always just figured magic did it. I never knew any of the biology until I met you.”
“You wouldn’t be wrong for thinking that way,” Laios half-shrugged. “They wouldn’t exist without some kind of mana source, so they’re still a product of magic. But to sustain the kind of huge, complex bodies dragons have on mana alone would starve the ecosystem, so they have to develop organs and bones to keep them upright and moving to serve their purpose.”
“To destroy whatever enters their lair?”
“To survive.”
“Same as the rest of us, then.”
Laios hummed. Chilchuck’s wrists had begun to hurt from holding the book, so he propped it up on the crown of Laios’ skull. He didn’t seem to mind.
“So what’s this big pearl they keep drawing the long dragon with?” Chilchuck asked, even though the answer was right beneath it, indicated helpfully in a list of figures.
“Oh, that’s an egg, believe it or not.”
“No kidding.”
“Dragon clutches start out pretty big, but because of how demanding the hatchlings are, most of them don’t survive to adulthood. Some species of dragon choose a ‘favorite’ out of their eggs to focus on and raise instead…”
Chilchuck smiled into the palm of his hand as Laios rambled, flipping through the book to keep his eyes open as Laios talked, listening as the spaces between words grew and his tangents unspooled, dissolving into dreamlike nonsense. The weight of Laios’ head got heavier in Chilchuck’s lap until the static crept back in, but Chilchuck had no intention of moving him anymore. It was well past the scheduled watch shift change by the time Laios began to softly snore, but Chilchuck didn’t rouse him.
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sp1rit-realm · 9 months ago
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༻¨*:· 𝐀𝐍𝐘𝐓𝐇𝐈𝐍𝐆 𝐅𝐎𝐑 𝐘𝐎𝐔. ·:*¨༺
༻¨*:· summary ·:*¨༺ 𖦹 you need aaron, he's there for you as soon as he can be
༻¨*:· notes ·:*¨༺ 𖦹 aaron hotchner x gn!reader (no use of gendered descriptions) 𖦹 implied that reader is shorter than hotch𖦹 aaron hotchner, the man you are 𖦹 guys... new hyperfixation 𖦹 hes so cute 𖦹 fluff☺︎☺︎☺︎☺︎
༻¨*:· words ·:*¨༺ 𖦹 789
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"Hotch?" You softly sob into the phone.
"L/n? What are you doing up so late?" His tone was nothing but stern, and it only encouraged the tears.
"Sorry, I just," Your words are interrupted by a small hiccup, "I just— Hotch, I'm sad."
His frown deepens, "I'm sorry. Is there," He takes a deep breath, "Is there anything I can do to help?"
"Come over?" 
And the plea in your voice makes him weak, and suddenly, he's throwing on a shirt and running to grab his keys. He doesn't even realize he's hung up the phone.
You cry harder at the sound of the dial tone. "He doesn't care," You repeatedly whisper to yourself, sobs growing louder with each repetition. 
Hotch is speeding, badge in his pocket in case he gets pulled over, but he doubts he will.
You clutch onto the stuffie Aaron won for you at the arcade in a pizza joint you dragged him to after a particularly stressful case. You remember it clear as day. 
˚₊‧꒰ა ☆ ໒꒱ ‧₊˚
"C'mon, Aaron," You whine, "Just try the claw machine?"
He looks at you, all traces of amusement vacant from his icy face, "L/n, no." 
"But," You pout, "I have the coins for it. Just," You stick your hand into your pocket—tongue poking out of your mouth—and clumsily grab two quarters, "Here."
He shakes his head, but he grabs the coins anyway, and he can't help but smile at the sight of you gleaming.
"C'mon," You grab his hand and lead him to the claw machine.
He pulls you close when you get there, "Which one do you want, baby?" He whispers into your hair. 
You look up at him and smile that adorable smile he loves, "That one." You point, finger pressing against the glass.
"If there's a murder here, they're going to find you guilty with that fingerprint there."
"Aaron," You whine, "Don't be mean."
"Why do you insist on holding my hand while I do this?" He quirks his brow, "I need both my hands, sweetheart."
You pout and slowly let go of his hand.
Aaron slips the coins in and positions the claw right above the stuffie.
"Press the button, Hotch!" You urge. 
He walks around to the side, analyzing the direct position of the claw.
"Aaron," You whine, "Press the button! You're running out of time!"
He returns to the front, adjusting the claw again, "Still got thirteen more seconds, baby."
"Thirteen seconds? Aaron, that's barely any time at all."
He doesn't take his eyes off the machine, "Thirteen seconds is a lot of time. You saved that boy in approximately ten."
"But Aaron, that was a life or death situation!"
His eyes flick towards yours, "So is this."
˚₊‧꒰ა ☆ ໒꒱ ‧₊˚
You hear footsteps, and you feel the adrenaline rush through your veins. You cover your mouth and sit up in fear.
The door knob rattles, and you remember that you're left defenseless. Your attacker would be able to hear you if you got off your bed and you curse yourself for not splurging on the nicer bedframe like Hotch kept telling you to. You never did like listening to him; he always hated it, rolling his eyes and shaking his head when you defy his requests.
The door opens, and you scream, curling into yourself.
"L/n, it's okay," He croons, "It's just me."
You frown, "You scared me."
He walks over to your bed, "I'm sorry, sweetheart. Can I sit down?"
You nod, still frowning.
"Actually, let me turn the light on first." 
You're worried he'll turn the overhead light on, but he knows you better. He turns on the small lamp on your bedside table, takes one look at your tear-stained face, and deepens his frown.
He sits next to you, "What's wrong?"
"Had a bad dream," You're close to crying again.
"Aww," He hums and rubs your back, "'M sorry, baby." 
You lean into him, "It's okay."
"Should we lay down?" He asks, and before he knows it, you're practically pulling him down. 
He lands with a laughing huff, "I'm considering that a yes."
You snuggle into his arms and nod.
He holds you like his life depends on it, smoothing down your hair and wiping off your tears, "What was your dream about? If you're okay sharing."
You look up at him, "You... you were mean to me. Called me," You sniffle, "Called me stupid. Told me I shouldn't be working with you guys."
He pulls you closer, "I would never say that, baby. You're more than bright enough to be working with us. In fact, we wouldn't be able to do half the things we do without you."
"Aaron?"
"Yes?"
"Thank you."
He kisses the top of your head, "Anything for you, honey."
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THANK YOU FOR READING!!!!! if you enjoyed, please reblog!!!! it would make my year <3
@mrsaluado @zvdvdlvr @ssahotchnerr
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capswarmedals · 11 months ago
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BBC GHOSTS: DEEP DIVE
"You're a bloody fool, James!" - Ben Willbond, Inside Ghosts: A Christmas Gift.
CONTAINS SPOILERS FOR CHRISTMAS EPISODE AND SEASON 5. BE WARNED.
Okay, just before we start, I WILL be referring to BOTH James and The Captain. Wait and see, your poor little dumplings.
We all know The Captain. Brave, stern, always has a stiff upper lip and of course, most obviously, he's an ABBA loving star. Joking (not really though)!! The most obvious part is that he is gay, but he hides it deep down inside himself. You'd have to kill him to find out or well, you know what I mean (/ref). That part deep down inside himself is James. James. The real person, the person under the mask, the villain, the mastermind of it all. Except that... James isn't really anything like The Captain. James is not brave, not stern, never has a stiff upper lift, but he's still an ABBA fan and gay. Incredibly, incredibly gay.
We know that he had a very, VERY strong crush on Havers (Anthony as I will be referring to) as evident in the Cricket Report in the Button House Archives and in Redding Weddy/Carpe Diem. Throughout the series, we see James fall for men. Mike ("Yes, he'd make a very fine soldier."), Adam, the director ("Yes, though I might just... Check."), Pat (even though it's not as obvious, but it's certainly there).
Many people, including myself, head canon James/The Captain to be autistic, and I can very much add some reason and proof to these reasons.
1. A very strict routine. This man will NOT let go of routine, and it is clear in 4x02 (Speak As Ye Chooses) where he states: "It's all very well saying 'At ease', but what do you do for the rest of the day?" and visible expression of shock and anger to finding out that a club was cancelled. As we come to the end of episode, where we see the man casually without his jacket on, he says "We've got forever" before immediately re-settling himself into his strict routine when being reminded of Film Club. But of course, this could be either that James is attracted to Captain America or is just reminded of his strict routine. This links into another point about change. In 3x05 (Something To Share?), this silly man agrees with Pat about how it is frightfully important to have an extremely strict routine. DON'T get me started on his almost coming out. (I will talk about this.)
2. Hyperfixations. This man has a hyperfixation/special interest in tanks, birds and basically anything remotely military related. He made a club solely dedicated FOR birds. He values his hyperfixations over secrets ("This is outrageous, I'll simply have to tell Fanny-" "No more war documentaries, then." "Your secret is safe with me, she'll have to kill me first- Well- You know what I mean."). 1x02, watching Hitler's Secret Superweapons "It's Christmas! I mean, it's Christmas Morning!" and when Mike turns it off... "What the bally heck do you think you are doing? Where the bally hell are the tanks?" "If you were dead, I would thrash your bottom, sir!". As like other autistic people, such as myself, taking away our hyperfixations isn't a good thing. We don't like that.
3. Masking/easily overwhelmed. (Basically what this deep dive is about). James is the true individual. The Captain is his mask, his shell. And he's been living in it for far too long now. He does not like change, and hates loud noises. This is clear when a club is cancelled in 4x02, and when he realizes the Queen's speech is televised in 2x07. He stress stims by using his swagger stick (Or Anthony's) and twirling it around in his fingers, he bounces a lot, he hums a lot, and whenever he matches about the place, he swings his arms depending on what arm the swagger stick is under (usually the right), and yes, I know that military marching is very exaggerating on the arms, but STILL, it's an output of energy that he does CONSTANTLY. I don't think I've seen anybody talk about the fact he hums. He does it SO MUCH.
4. Tone. Because of his ridiculous amount of gayness inside of him, this man cannot always understand straight jokes. 5x04, where they play Blankety Blank and he does not understand the word "saucy" (I mean, it is late 20th century/early 21st century slang...) and does not approve of the meaning. He gets jokes late, but that's alright because I do too.
ANYWAYS. Back to his pining.
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In the first GIF, you see James check Adam out. This also happens in another scene with the quote "Do you find yourself to be distracted?" where he takes the moment to check Adam out yet again. In this second GIF, you see James slightly creep out when he realizes that he's openly saying he'll miss a man, with that look down, almost ashamed of himself.
But why does he fall for these men of order? Because it reminds him of Anthony, not because they're bossing everyone about - it's as if they're doing the bossing about for him, so he can relax and be himself. During Redding Weddy, we see Anthony order the unit around whilst James is looking outside the window (suppressing stims, but bouncing slightly on his feet) trying to spot Germans. I could see why James fell for Anthony. Despite everyone else, Anthony does not see these stims as annoying or his remarks to be unfunny. We see him SMILE when James makes a joke.
As we know, their love for each other was mutual.
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He knew.
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Anthony smiles after saying "James" and saying "I know". Why? He knew he was dying, he knew that James loved him, he knew why James was here. He wanted to be by James' side as he died to comfort him. To just be together, maybe once. Maybe twice. We don't know if they've held hands, kissed, but still. This is a very significant moment.
Additionally, Anthony's knowledge of James' intense crush is during their talk in James' office in Redding Weddy as it starts to reach a conclusion. Anthony subtly hints to the fact that if James should say anything, the moment is now ("Well, if that's all?").
He raises his eyebrow slightly, communicating to James that he is eager to hear what he really says, and that it's okay to be them because they're alone together. But no. The Captain completely hides James away. Anthony understands, he always has. The Captain probably hid James away because of Anthony's reaction to "I shall miss you, Havers." (his smile drops).
But... "I say, Havers?"
The way Anthony turns around. SO QUICK.
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His smile. It's so ridiculously warm. But he knows because he saw that hesitancy, he saw James' sad expression. James is bally well sad that Anthony is leaving!!
Masking is clearly shown in this conversation. The Captain is preventing James from speaking the truth. And just like how he buried the limpet mine, he too, buried his feelings. And it became a ticking time bomb to Carpe Diem, where that emotional bomb finally explodes.
He leaves it to the last second. Literally. Let me show you proof.
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Ben is absolutely AMAZING at micro-expressions, one of the many reasons I love to delve into The Captain so much. Carpe Diem (5x05) is an excellent example of some of the best James scenes.
Right here, what I am personally reading is that James is attempting to unmask, or is in the process of doing so. He deciding whether he should tell his story or not. This frame is important as it comes just after the quote "When I died, I never got to be surrounded by the people I loved." Blatant foreshadowing here because well, it shows that James loved Anthony and still does, despite it being 83 years since Anthony left of that year, he still holds him very dear to his heart. Of course, he has Anthony's swagger stick, which I love because he's always been there with James to help him out through moments. I love that and I love everything about that. How I ADORE Simon Hynd's directing here of the camera position, openly hinting to the fact that James died with Anthony next to him. God, everyone in that show is a mastermind!!
I also think that he is remembering here. Perhaps remembering the good memories? That Sunday afternoon stroll, or that certain Cricket Report? He's trying desperately to remember Anthony so he doesn't forget him when he moves on. For all he knows, he doesn't even know if Anthony thinks of him. All he knows is that he knew, and is most probably dead. He doesn't know what's beyond the veil. He doesn't know if he'll see Anthony. It's worth it.
This "desperate searching" facial expression is the same as the expression he had when glancing at the gate a few scenes prior to this, eyebrows furrowed and mouths slightly agape. It cuts to the gate, where we know, that in Redding Weddy, Havers walked out of. Anthony. Yet again, he's remembering him. James is obsessed with the memory of Anthony, the good times they had yet the good times they never were really good as laws about homosexuality were extremely strict. You could even say he is clingy.
Another thing is that, The Captain is one of the most favourite characters and people have been demanding to see how he died for ages! Why is it near the end of the last season? Well. I may have an idea to why it is in the last season.
James leaves things until the last second, he leaves the real explanation to things until it's too late. I saw someone on tiktok quote that James is as pretty as poppies because his love sprouts up in the wrong times and wrong places, which I think is amazing. I personally believe that his death was purposely the last one because you needed to see that he's more than just a stern WW2 CO with no feelings. He's an anxious man who's terrified of the real world so decides to seclude himself in a time and place where he was loved. World War 2. 1940. When Anthony loved him. We needed to see this inner secluded character within him to make the death sadder, which is what Ben likes, the silly man.
This also explains why he says "Is it? Is it, Alison?" during Redding Weddy because, well, with his mindset and attitude, he doesn't believe the war is over. He wasn't very good at keeping a unit of alive people under control, but perhaps he could try at keeping a whole bunch of dead people under control to keep himself busy from accepting the fact that Anthony is gone and he should emotionally move on.
In 4x04 (Gone Gone), the episode where Mary moves on, we see that James' coping mechanism is to keep himself busy. Keep himself busy so he doesn't have to focus on his feelings, but when he's given the time to pause and process it... He completely breaks down. Imagine that with Anthony when he left for North Africa.
But why does he like Pat?
Well. It isn't canon. But, the most recent Christmas special definitely hints at it. Pat introduced James to the amazing thing of baby talking, attempting to teach him just as Mia is put to bed. But once again The Captain's hard shell is back again and gives him a monotone voice and tone, rather making him seem like a robot. But at the end of the episode. He learned, and the glance he takes towards Pat is "Did I do it?" and Pat gives him a warm smile and a subtle nod. HUSBANDS I TELL YOU!
The Woodworm Men (3x03): Pat outbests The Captain with camping, yet they are still both very keen. The Captain trudged back though!! In this episode, James is awarded the teamwork badge from Pat, and when you see the scene, you can tell that he is smitten and in love. Because, now rewatching that scene with the context of his death, he must've been the happiest he had been in a while to achieve and properly earn a badge. James, I think, personally likes Pat because he still has all the leading roles (being a scout leader) and that reminds him a lot of Anthony hence why we see them working together in a lot of episodes (2x06, 2x02, etc). It all leads back to Anthony. Who knows what would've happened if they didn't meet.
I also think that Getting Out (1x06) is a good episode that represents self growth as well as debating with the issue of being mocked, as James is mocked in the episode.
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This is him overhearing the conversation. Confusion. Anger. This episode is where James learns that not everybody will adapt themselves for him, not everybody will accept the way he acts. It's pretty clear that he cannot control this mindset he has, it was probably drilled into him, the poor soul. The way he brings himself back into the group is through a secret weapon (Kitty, because she's the most likeable and their relationship is mwah).
This episode is also important because of the scene in the library with James and Kitty.
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"What matters more? Keeping Alison here, or letting her be happy?"
Now imagine that question but Anthony. James has sacrificed his life and soul towards Anthony, and even has a piece of him with him. This man is obsessed with Anthony. Crazily in love. He can't control his feelings for people. It just... Happens.
After Carpe Diem, it took me only a fraction of a second to see how comfortable he was. He was free to love who he wanted! I was stimming so crazily when the last scene of Season 5 (disregarding the Christmas special) was him being gay. Fanny comforted him after he came out, and every one supported him. He feels safe now.
The mirror and the draw in the intro.
Personally, I believe that the mirror represents the fact that his medals are the right way, meaning that the man in the mirror is The Captain and the man looking at his reflection is James. He's looking what he could've been. A hero. Yet now that he's come to terms with himself, James knows that he can be himself now. Free of judgement. Free of secluding himself away. I believe that the drawer represents him ever searching for more memories to grasp onto, more things about Anthony to remember. I also think it represents the fact that there is something inside of him that is worth looking for, and that thing deserves to be looked for and looked after. The draw is pulled out as far as it can go, so this could point to the fact that there is something buried within the house that needs to be found and given back to him. Could be the limpet mine. Or perhaps that William letter truly was a love letter.
OVERALL:
James is a different man to The Captain. The Captain is merely a costume or a nickname James wears knowing full well of the man he is underneath those perceived images of him. James is a coward. James is obsessed with Anthony. His heart has bled so much he has to rely on the small amount of attention from someone so he can carve it out and then offer it to those people who attention has been wasted on him. Ben is an amazing actor and writer who threads things together so subtly and sneakily it's insane. James won't let go of the military mindset, just incase he meets Anthony when he moves on. He thinks that no one will fall in love with the present him so he tries his best to act like his old self. Ben is right. You certainly are a fool, James. But oh, how I love your character.
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random-potat · 3 months ago
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and they were roommates - kjs. - pt. 4
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part 4. moving in (wc. 456)
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Packing your belongings that's enough for six weeks in forty-five minutes is definitely easier said than done, but alas, it is not completely impossible. Honestly, you can't really tell if you are overpacked or underpacked. What mattered most was that Bada didn't kill you for procrastinating.
With five minutes to spare, you rush down to the parking lot to store your luggage in the trunk of the car.
The rest of your members come down to say goodbye. Let's just say the dramatics were turned on, that's for sure. 
“I'm surprised you actually packed quickly,” your leader says. 
“What can I say? I'm serious about my cookie dough.” 
"I can't believe you’re leaving me behind,” Ria dramatically wails. 
Rolling your eyes, you pull her in for a hug. “It’s not like I’m permanently moving; I’ll be gone for like six weeks.” You pat Ria’s back and say, "Plus, we’ll still see each other for practice.” 
“That’s only if there is something to practice for.” Eunwoo interrupts, hugging the two of you. 
Bada lovingly pinches Eunwoo. “Don't say that, Eunwoo, we still have festivals to practice for,” Bada says as she joins in the group hug. 
“As much as I would hate to break this group moment, we really have to go now, YN,” manager Woo interrupts. 
After saying what seems to be but isn’t really your final goodbyes to your group members, you head into the car for a long one and a half-hour drive away from the city.
After a long ride that only involved sleeping, you arrive outside of the shared villa that you’ll eventually be sharing with five other people, who also happen to be idols. “Can’t wait to get cancelled,” you thought. 
Manager Woo begins to give you a quick debrief of what is going to happen.  
“Everything is already set up in the house. The producers will be in the hallway guiding you where to go, and you guys will all be entering individually.”
“Wow, this is some Love Island-type shit. Minus the love part,” you quickly look around your surroundings, “and the island,” you respond.
Manager Woo gives you a stern look and says, "After that, everything is going to be directed by the producer. Schedules will be sent to you like normal, but most things won’t interrupt the filming for this show.
You nod your head.
Manager Woo gave a small smile, "Just enjoy the experience, don’t take everything too seriously, okay?”
"Sir, yes, sir.” You send a mocking salute.
Getting out of the car and dragging your luggage towards the house, you take a deep breath in and out. “Of course I’m the first one going in. Well, here goes nothing. A hot new bombshell enters the villa.”
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a/n: very subtle love island references cause that was my hyperfixation when i was writing this in the summer :p but other than that hope you guys are enjoying it so far. really just creating this as i go but i do have ideas that i know i want to be in the story, so we'll just have to see where this ends up lmao!! also school has officially started as im posting this so that's really fun :)) much more writing to do although essays aren't fun
synopsis: With long-time K-pop fans asking for another season of the infamous variety show We Got Married, MBC brings it back with a spin-off, We Became Roommates. As a way to bring K-pop fans together, the first season involves six idols born in 2005. With seeing each other every day, doing missions for every episode, making memories, and fans watching and shipping, blossoming friendships and a bubbling romance can't be helped. pairing: idol!jongseob x fem idol!reader genre: idol au, crack, fluff, humour, coworkers to friends to lovers
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likes and reblogs are appreciated ⋆˙⟡♡
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purpurussy · 7 months ago
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what is all of this like for post-hiatus phannies?
I've been trying to figure out how to phrase this for a minute. The most obvious comparison would be that it's like starting a TV show 10 seasons in, but that doesn't come remotely close to the amount of required reading necessary to understand even 5% of the references. This has not been a problem for me, as I love nothing more than a good all-consuming hyperfixation rabbit hole, but something I'm realizing is that you really just had to be there to fully Understand.
I got into d&p properly in December of 2023, when gamingmas appealed to my emotionally curious nature and then gave me some kind of irreversible brain damage which I'm still trying to process. Since then I've been consuming their back catalogue as though it's laced with cocaine, and obsessively lurking on phannie tumblr until I finally made this blog a few weeks ago.
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I actually watched Dan's videos for a little while back in roughly 2013/2014, but something about his content back then just wasn't working for me like it does now (I have such a clear memory of watching Reasons Why Dan’s A Fail and thinking "aw man why does this cute little twink hate himself so much 😔" and then going back to watching Jenna Marbles lmao. Funnily enough it did make me change my negative self-talk a little bit). I was very much a brief casual viewer who went off them pretty much after watching a few videos, and after that I was sort of vaguely aware of them as the cultural icons of the 2010s that they were, but I wasn't keeping up with them at all. 
I don't even remember BIG coming out, which is insane because I've always been extremely chronically online and it definitely broke containment as a cultural moment (although I think I was trying to minimize my social media use at that point in my life, so maybe that's why it went over my head). I feel like I must have heard something about it at the time, though, because I knew they were gay when I started watching them last year. What's really strange is that a lot of this stuff is kinda timeless to me. I don't remember it happening 5, 10 or 15 years ago - I just witnessed it very recently. For a lot of you guys, BIG happened 5 years ago, but I just watched it for the first time a few months ago. At the same time, in my mind they've just always been gay, since I wasn't in the trenches of the unhinged online culture surrounding them in the early/mid 2010s. It's so confusing to balance my weird temporal perception of these events with the impressions that I get from you guys. Oftentimes I have to judge roughly when something would have happened based on their appearances - it's not actually a *memory* for me, like it is for you. I absolutely love the dynamic and branding they have now, and the deep dives into their past are more of a curious exploration of how they got here, rather than actually nostalgic (or, I suppose, mildly traumatic) for me. It’s still very interesting and compelling to me, but because I love the current iteration of Dan and Phil, not because I’m emotionally invested in who they used to be. 
Sometimes I’ll be aware that an event happened, but I won’t realize how monumental it was until I see people talking about it (I hate to say it but I genuinely don't fully understand why the BONCAs thing was so earth-shattering, but like I said, I've always lived in a post-BIG universe, and I think you just had to be there). There are also plenty of references to stuff that's just been lost to time, which I have to piece together with context clues, as well as the more unhinged demonic stuff that I just don't have any interest in exploring whatsoever (I think I might have watched the v-day video if I'd been there when it leaked and I was a stupid teenager, but at this point, I don't even feel any kind of morbid curiosity for it. I just feel really bad for them that it got leaked. Plus, unfortunately, I think I've learned all I need to know about it through internet osmosis here). I feel like a lot of these events have a real emotional meaning for you guys, when to me, they're just interesting/funny/insane anecdotes which give some context to everything. Some of the shit that you guys lived through back then is absolutely wild, and I love and appreciate all of you for meticulously archiving and documenting everything and for being so willing to answer the same questions over and over again! Otherwise I feel like I wouldn't be able to really be part of this community, and posting my silly little memes on this blog is so fucking fun. So thank you all for that.
It seems like this is one of the most ride-or-die fanbases I've ever seen. The fact that they could invent the concept of YouTubers doing world tours, successfully execute that multiple times, branch out into several other ventures, come out as gay not fully knowing how that would affect their careers, disappear for several years and then come back knowing that there would be a solid audience waiting for them even after their virality had died down, drop merch every 3 seconds - I don't know who else can really get away with that, for almost 15 years, in the extremely "live fast die young" culture of internet fame. And I think it's in no small part because you all have chronic "unconditionally supporting dan and phil" disease. (While we’re on the topic, I feel very lucky to have missed the hiatus era. There's kind of a compression in the timeline for me between the gaming channel going dark and Dan starting his WAD tour, where it's like that time just doesn't exist in the Dan and Phil cinematic universe for me. It took me a while to realize how insane it must have been when they came back in full force, I can't even imagine how that must have felt.)
Of course, there's a caveat in that I'm saying this only really knowing about the tip of the demon iceberg. I’m aware of people engaging in behaviours such as doxxing them, outing them and stalking their families, which is horrifying in and of itself, but I don’t know how long it went on for or how many people were involved. I think people are generally pretty well-behaved at this point, and most of the drama seems to be between different schools of thought within the fanbase itself. I assume a big part of the reason for that is people's varying degrees of involvement in (and remaining notion of guilt for) the boundary-crossing behaviour from the old days. Living with the spectre of this insanity is kind of strange - it makes me feel nervous sometimes that I’m gonna accidentally say something that hits a nerve, or cross a line I didn’t know existed, because there’s all this history that I don’t fully understand, beyond just the normal unwritten rules for interacting with fan spaces online. 
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The topic that got me writing this in the first place was the orange heart incident, and everyone’s subsequent meltdown. For me, the excitement in them soft/hard/semi launching is more about me just getting excited about any open, proud expression of queer joy - it heals something inside me every time I hear a man referring to his husband or a woman referring to her wife (excuse the gendered terms, ykwim. gay shit). It's just that sentiment, combined with the fact that I'm parasocially invested in them: I'd love to see that energy from my fave little guys who live inside my computer. I am basically rooting for them to become more comfortable with just talking about gay stuff more openly and candidly, and I guess that would require a bit of a hard launch, although I can understand that they don't want to potentially open the door to excessive questioning regarding their relationship. I feel like it ✨hits different✨ for people who watched them for years before they came out. Like, you guys are rooting for people who you watched in real time struggling with their identities and internalized homophobia for years and years, while to me, they’re just some guys who I’m a fan of. Sometimes I get caught up in the emotional frenzy of their hard-launch breadcrumbs even though I don’t feel quite as insane about it as you guys (I said in some tags a few days ago that it’s like the base instinct to turn around and start running if you see a crowd of people running towards you and screaming in terror, even if you have no idea what’s going on). Anyway, I would love to see them being more gooey with each other, and I am gobbling up the breadcrumbs they're feeding us atm, because I love seeing gay people expressing gay love with no shame 🧡 
I think my perception of them as a couple, or of their sexualities independently, is just kind of an extension of everything Dan said in BIG. I really have no doubt that they're a couple, and I don't feel any kind of weird Catholic guilt in saying that, since I neither witnessed nor participated in the insanity back then. I interpreted (I'm paraphrasing) "obviously we were more than friends, but it was more than just romantic, we're like, actual soulmates" followed by "as for the situation now? we're private people and we'd like to keep that part of our lives private" as him essentially saying that obviously they're a couple, but that their relationship is not part of the Dan And Phil™ Brand. The brand is 2 guys who have great chemistry doing comedy together (5 feet apart even though clearly they are gay and in love). And I think that's a completely healthy decision to make, even irrespective of their history. I think a hard launch would be subtle, and it wouldn’t realistically change the nature of their content that much. 
With that being said, to me, it seems slightly wild for people to adamantly insist they're not a couple, or that it’s “invasive” to assume that they are one (not that that really applies to anyone here, but elsewhere on the internet). If they were a straight man and a straight woman, and there wasn't a huge chunk of people on the internet struggling with this oddly conditioned aversion to seeing them as a couple, then nobody on earth would be insisting that it's weird to assume they're together. Dan confirmed that they became romantically involved around the time they met, and building a forever home with your ex is crazy, that's all there is to it.
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This is kind of a messy stream of thoughts (it ended up sort of becoming 2 essays for the price of 1) and I don't really know where I was going with it. In conclusion I think that day 1 phannies are braver than any US marine and you have all suffered more than Jesus on the cross, and I'm extremely thankful that I get to reap the rewards of your labour now without having lived through the dark ages myself. I also think some of you are holding onto a bit of unnecessary guilt for dumb shit you said on the internet when you were a kid. And Dan and Phil are gay and I love them and I reeeeaaaallllyyy want them to do a podcast so bad because this is all conjecture and I would parasocially love to hear their actual thoughts on it
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lemonwisp · 4 months ago
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Okay folks here is my honest review of season 4 of the umbrella academy (not that it matters but this is from a person who’s obsession runs so deep I started a meme page for this show, I started making edits because of this show, I found out how to label my sexuality because of this show, after season 1 I bought all the comics and then I also bought the you look like death comics when they came out, I have nearly every funko pop (rip hazel and cha cha when I get you and when I get young Ben my collection will be complete) I love this show more than words can describe)
I was expecting it to be bad, in the way that season 3 was bad, and it wasn’t bad in that way, however there was still some awful cgi (tua really shows me that shows can have wonderful and awful cgi at the same time)
I enjoyed the first episode and became hopeful when Klaus got the dog tags but then he doesn’t even put them on despite keeping them. I loved Klaus’s friendship with Claire, I liked Luther acting like a golden retriever. Blah blah blah. I liked Diego and the piñata and the fact they called their firstborn Grace was really sweet
However the continuity errors in this season really bothered me. At the end of season 3 Klaus still has the dog tags and temple tattoo, in the promotional picture Klaus has the temple tattoo, yet in the show it wasn’t there.
The plot hole of Sloane not being there (I know realistically when Allison told Reggie the timeline she wanted she was being selfish but still)
Also the thing about Lila and hating bracelets totally goes back on the fact that Diego got her one in season 2 and she wore it all the time.
THE FACT IT TOOK THEM SO LONG TO GET TO MAINE BUT WHEN PEOPLE JUST WALKED OFF THEY GOT BACK TO THEIR HOUSES AND STUFF SO FAST
The fact Ray leaving was mentioned only twice and we never got more information on that.
The fact that Klaus pulled the lovers card and Dave didn’t come back! The fact Klaus had time to try to summon Dave and just didn’t. Klaus writing STOP on their hand and then that just disappearing. Also Klaus’s PTSD just not being shown anymore.
I’m not even going to talk about the Lila and Five situation because I’m so unbelievably angry about it. I’m obviously angry about Dave not being mentioned at all.
Also I thought Klaus being a medium was clever but also then it just turned into them being used and idk I just want Klaus to be happy
Also Ben this season was funny, but I just miss brelly Ben so much.
And while they were in the subway station I was waiting for Brelly ben to show up because the scene in season 3 of Ben BEING ON A TRAIN! I was like oh that must be brelly ben, like that’s where he went after turning into swiss cheese and then they’d get him and have him face sparrow Ben or something.
And after all of the lead up to how Ben originally died and it just being that Reggie killed him. I feel like that wasn’t that big of a shock value because Reginald seems like the type to do that. I also feel like it was kind of boring. But I did appreciate the fact the young cast were in season 4
Also I’m not saying Jennifer should have died but they said only one of them needed to die and I know it’s selfish to want Ben to live and I felt bad for Jennifer it’s just I didn’t really grow attached to her
I understand why it ended the way it did but also am upset with the ending. I admit the marigolds at the end were cute, but even though I know it’s self indulgent to wish for this I just wanted them to be happy. Or even if the ending was just like a time loop and it restarted back to season 1 would have made me feel a bit more satisfied.
I don’t know, it’s just that I’ve grown up watching tua, I’ve spent five years of my life hyperfixating on this show, and it feels like the actors care about their characters and the writers do not.
However I’m so glad I got to be part of this journey with all the other TUA fans, I thank everyone who supported my meme page I have on Instagram, who makes fan art, fan fiction, and edits about the show and comics, everyone who cares about TUA, and I’m sorry that it ended the way that it did because frankly seeing the fans care more about the characters than the writers hurts. Knowing the injustices done to the characters hurts, but I’m glad I’m not alone when I say season four kinda fucking sucked.
EDIT: NOT TO EVEN MENTION IN SEASON 3 BEN KEPT DRAWING JENNIFER THEN THAT WAS NEVER MENTIONED IN SEASON 4 and CLAIRE KNEW KLAUS WAS IMMORTAL LIKE WHEN DID SHE FIND THAT OUT
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